About: Frustration
by toomanypickles
Summary: One day they'll stop running and finally accept life for what it is. Simple moments of life hold the key to everything. Sakura and Gaara. Continued in About: Time, the sequel.
1. First Encounter

About Frustration

First Encounter

Gaara watched as the carriage stopped to dump a bundle out into the sand and sped away. He waited until that bundle stopped rolling down the side of the dune before walking toward it.

He realized before he reached it that it was a body, but he didn't quicken his pace. He walked calmly up to the unconscious human, casting his shadow over her face. The girl stirred and opened one eye a crack. Judging by how swollen the other eye was, she probably couldn't even open it if she wanted. Her whole body took the example of her eye it seemed. She must have done something to make someone very angry.

The girl opened her mouth a little and Gaara could smell fresh blood as her lips cracked open. She spoke with a gurgling noise, as though there was liquid in her throat. 'Blood no doubt.' "Gaara."

She knew his name. Gaara examined her more closely than before, wondering if he should recognize her. Pink hair, a large forehead… ah yes, the girl who was always with that Sasuke brat. He couldn't remember her name anyway. "You must be a weaker ninja than I thought, letting yourself get beaten like this."

_Sakura shriveled up inside at the truth in his words, if it was even possible for her to feel worse than she had already. She said nothing and closed her eyes against the sun and the view of his cold jade expression. She rolled onto his feet, curling her body around his legs in an attempt to get his help._

_Please, she willed him mentally. Please just untie me._

_When he stepped away she curled up even tighter around the space where he had been, willing it to be untrue. Wishing the rope tied around her wasn't there. Wishing she was still home in Konoha village._

_She felt the ropes cut behind her and opened her eye to look at Gaara. He was standing a foot away, watching her. He had actually helped her?_

_When she got to her feet unsteadily he didn't move. They stood and stared at each other for a long while, until silently Gaara turned and walked away. It took Sakura a moment of indecision to react, but she trailed after him, deciding it was better to be stuck with Gaara than alone in the desert. Death was a little less certain._

Gaara sat a few feet away from the sleeping girl and cursed her. Stupid girl, needing to sleep. Being able to sleep.

He stood and looked over at her, contemplating waking her up and moving on, but she was already so slow. Looking out across the desert he entertained thoughts of just leaving her. But if he was going to kill her, he felt he should do it himself, not leave it to nature. Maybe he would strangle her in her sleep and bury her out here…

He looked at her over his shoulder, then without making a sound moved so he stood over her, inspecting her. She looked so pathetic with her scrapes and bruises. How could a ninja let themselves get so beaten without dying first?

Of course, things could have changed. It had been a few years since Gaara had been a ninja, almost a year now since he had even seen another human being.

The girl screamed in her sleep and pushed away some invisible attacker. Her scream seemed to wake her and she sat bolt upright, her hands reaching for kunai knives that weren't there. Gaara stared at the wild fear in her eyes, wondering why he hadn't made her feel such fear. Everyone else did.

When she had calmed down a little and noticed him standing there, she crawled back in the sand and curled up on herself, staring at him silently with wide eyes. He saw fear there, but not like she had shown in her sleep.

_Sakura's foot was getting itchy, but she didn't want to move. Gaara had been standing there staring at her for so long she wondered if he even realized what he was doing. 'Not that he cares if he's making me uncomfortable. I'm sure he's enjoying it.' Finally she felt so agitated she just had to fidget, so she scratched her foot. It seemed to break the spell of the moment, as Gaara turned away._

"_What's your name?" he asked suddenly._

'_Of course he wouldn't remember your name,' Sakura told herself, 'You were never anything more than a fly to him. You shouldn't have expected him to know your name.' But she couldn't help feeling hurt, and worse; useless. None of this was apparent to Gaara when she told him her name though._

_And then he walked away. Sakura glanced around quickly before following._

_For a while she was content to follow behind him silently, watching the way his gourd swayed slightly as he walked. They walked this way for what must have been hours before Sakura got sick of all the silence. She trotted up beside him to watch his face as she talked._

"_Where are we? How far is it to the nearest village?" she asked, "Or could we maybe find a well or something. I think I've got sand in my eye."_

_Gaara didn't look at her or respond._

"_Gaara? Are you listening?"_

_He stopped and pointed. Sakura followed his finger to a distant dark spot on the horizon. After squinting at it for a while she realized it was a group of people._

"_The desert men," Gaara explained, "They can help you now."_

Gaara watched fear creep back into the girl's face as she watched the group of men. He noted everything about her stance indicating her unwillingness to go after the men. Her hands clenched in her skirt, her shoulders hunching over defensively, her feet shifting in the sand. She started making a sort of moaning noise without seeming to notice.

As she shuffled nervously from foot to foot the men drew nearer. They were still but a dot on the horizon, but they were definitely getting closer.

She noticed as well and turned her back to them to scan the desert behind them, biting her lip. Gaara didn't bother to look. He knew what was out there: nothing. He didn't know what her problem was, but her shuffling was getting on his nerves.

"Stop that." He snapped at her.

She dropped her skirt and straightened her shoulders all at once. "Will you please just take me to the nearest village?" she asked quietly.

Gaara glanced sidelong at her. It wasn't these desert men who had beaten her and dumped her in the desert, so why was she so mush more afraid of them than of him? Her seeming 'trust' in him galled him.

_Again Gaara was just staring at her. Sakura wished she knew what he was thinking; maybe she could get some hint as to what to say to get a decision from him._

"_Please." She repeated instead._

_Gaara shrugged slightly and turned to leave. Sakura guessed that meant yes and found herself once again following him. They fell into silence again, Sakura watching the motion of his gourd._

_She let her mind be free of any thoughts for once, smiled a little at Gaara's back. She should not think a lot more often. Just let her mind go blank, watch the gourd swaying back and forth, back and forth._

Gaara turned when he heard the girl collapse. He had expected her to have decided she had gone far enough and sat down to complain. He was going to get rid of her then, say she was too weak and leave.

But when he looked back at her he found she had passed out in the sand. He crouched beside her to listen to her breathing and wondered how any ninja could be so weak. Upon closer inspection he saw that her cuts were deeper than he had thought. He remembered then that she would probably need water more often than he. She must have pushed herself to her limit.

'How pathetic, if that's her limit.'

Gaara shrugged and settled nearby to meditate until she woke up. Then they would go to the nearest oasis and if she once complained he would leave her to fend for herself.

_When she woke up her tongue felt like sand in the worst way. Full of dust, and it probably was. Blindly, she reached for a canteen, but there was nothing at her hip. As she sat up she winced at the pain that shot through her entire body. Trying her best to ignore it she stood and tried a few stretches._

_When she finished her pathetic little attempt Gaara nodded to her and walked away. 'Well, at least he's consistent,' she thought and grinned despite herself. Her bottom lip cracked open and started to bleed. She thought she saw Gaara twitch for a moment, but soon told herself she had imagined it as he continued to walk. 'That would just be too creepy.'_

_She must have been crazy for lack of water because she tried to start another conversation with Gaara. "Do you need water too?" she asked, trying to get herself to stop, but it was like she was possessed. "You seem so…sandy. Does water affect your sand?" No response. "I don't believe I've ever been to this part of the desert before… Do you live here?" No response. "Of course, you couldn't live here all the time because you still have your duties as Kazekage. But you don't…"_

_Gaara turned and stood inches from her before Sakura could blink. "You shut up."_

_But Sakura wasn't thinking straight and she continued, "You… But you could have been great."_

"_Could have been great? I am great." Gaara spat. His green eyes glinted dangerously, "And look at what's become of the Leaf ninjas! Are they all as pathetic as you, or are you still the weakest?"_

_Sakura said nothing, but now Gaara was ready to talk, "I hear you have a good brain, as if that could make up for your weakness. But how smart can you be really if you never gave up on your hopeless 'love'?" He pointed to her bruises, "Why didn't you think yourself out of that?"_

_Sakura said nothing and Gaara walked away. "You disgust me."_

Gaara stopped for a moment, and then changed his course so they wouldn't miss the oasis. They would sometimes be well hidden by dunes on all sides and so they were easy to miss.

He couldn't believe the girl was still following him. 'She must enjoy pain.' He thought angrily. She hadn't said anymore at least, yet Gaara found himself listening every once in a while to make sure she was still breathing. A living thing, not some lifeless doll.

They reached the oasis as the sun was setting. Gaara hung back as the girl stumbled forward to drink the water greedily.

After slurping up enough water to content her the girl lay back on the sand. She would not look at him. Fine.

Gaara walked to the water and refilled his canteen and then drank some himself. When he looked back she girl was rubbing her at her cuts with water. He stood and watched her for while, noting the water droplets on her cheeks and in her long pink hair. She had cut it once, if he remembered properly.

She growled and the smell of blood reached his nostrils. He was reminded of how long it had been since he had killed anything…

Unconsciously he had moved closer to the girl and now he looked down at her. Still she refused to look at him, even with his shadow over her. Did she think this would make him angry? Was she trying to get back at him for his words earlier? Gaara snorted at her foolishness.

"I could take the sand out, if you want." He offered, unsure of himself for some reason.

She looked up at him then, her green eyes strangely expressive. "And have my blood in your gourd?" She looked disgusted and Gaara hated it.

Still he did not strangle her. Somehow he continued to remain calm and reasonable, "You'll never get it all that way."

She twisted her shirt nervously. Gaara hated that too, but she agreed to let him clean her cuts.

_Sakura tried to let her mind go blank as she had before, but as Gaara crouched beside her she found she could not. She was afraid suddenly as memories surfaced that she only wanted to forget. What if he…?_

_She relaxed a little when he closed his eyes and put two fingers to his forehead. So he wouldn't even touch her, and he wouldn't see. He held out his other hand palm up._

_She had to bite her lip to keep from crying out when the sand came out of her eye. Of course she hadn't expected it to be painless, but the burning sensation was much worse than she had expected. She had to let go of her lip for a moment when sand started coming out of her mouth too._

_The rest wasn't any worse, but it didn't feel any better. Gaara never moved as sand drifted out of her arms and legs, from under her clothes to settle in a bloody heap on his palm._

_Lastly he took the sand out of her feet. Sakura breathed deeply as the procedure was finished. She looked at herself, "Wow, clean." She smiled weakly._

_Gaara stood and walked a few feet away then very slowly and deliberately poured the sand he had taken from her onto the ground._

'_Your blood isn't even good enough for him, that's how much you disgust him.' she thought bitterly, believing that over the thought that he was just reassuring her for what she had said before._

_He sat down and started to meditate. As he did, a miniature sandstorm wrapped itself around him protectively. Sakura watched the phenomenon for a while then turned and took another drink. The water was surprisingly cool, and so clear she could see individual grains of sand at the bottom. She was suddenly very aware of the sore burn in her whole body and she waded in. The water in the center was deep enough to reach over her head. Contented with the cooling sensation on her burning muscles she floated on the surface, thinking of how nice it would be to nap right there. She saw Gaara's gourd in her mind's eye, swaying back and forth._

_She realized she was falling asleep and waded back to the shore where she laid with her feet in the water and let herself sleep._


	2. Part 2

"Gaara. Gaara."

He opened his eyes to glare at the girl, standing sopping wet in front of him, dripping on his foot. When she saw he was paying attention she seemed to smile, but Gaara doubted it was really a smile. "I need to be stronger," she said.

He tried to decide if he could count that as a complaint as he said, "That much is obvious," expecting her to clamp up and leave him alone, as she had done before. Hoping. Instead she seemed to take that as his way of saying he would help her achieve this strength she wanted.

"Great!" she clapped her hands together, "Do you have any kunai I can use?"

"No." Gaara shut his eyes to her and tried to find that peace she had disrupted, but she was having none of it.

His fingers twitched involuntarily as she spoke in his ear, "Please help me. Just until we're out of the desert. Then you'll never have to see me ever again." Didn't she realize how close she was, and how it made his blood boil? It would be so easy to just reach out now and snap her neck.

Too easy. Gaara wanted some excitement. He wanted something that could last, at least longer than a few seconds. It seemed that for now she was worth more alive than dead. Maybe training the girl would clear away the boredom, if only for a little while.

Gaara stood and faced the girl, "No weapons."

"So you'll help me!" She cheered and smiled for real this time. It was a strange thing, her smile. All lopsided and bloody and on top of that it was meant for him. No one smiled for him.

"It will take us longer to reach the village," he warned and started out of the oasis into a sandstorm that had started during the night. It took him a few paces to notice the girl was not following. He returned to the oasis to find her sitting by the water's edge, looking absolutely miserable. She didn't seem to notice him until he stood right above her. Then she looked up and smiled.

"You came back!"

Gaara glared at her. She was acting like a child. She stopped smiling and looked to the edge of the oasis.

"I can't go out in that." She said blandly, then stared at him intently, "What does it feel like?"

"I wouldn't know."

Her shoulders slumped slightly. "Of course," she muttered, "you just protect yourself behind your own barrier of sand. No one can touch you." She shuddered. Gaara narrowed his eyes.

"If you can't go anywhere, we could at least get started with your training."

_Sakura sighed as Gaara reached a hand of sand past her defense and tapped her shoulder. She hadn't been able to stop one attack of his, despite the surprisingly gentle nature of them. She had half expected him to just throw her around and throttle her as training, but she had been willing to put up with that._

_In a way, this was more embarrassing, but she was beyond caring. She just wanted to be stronger and for now, Gaara was helping her get there._

_Gaara's eyes narrowed slightly just before he reached a foot behind her knee and toppled her. Sakura winced and glared up at him from her spot in the sand._

"_You'll never be any good if you don't concentrate." He said and moved to sit where he had been sitting earlier that morning._

'_I have been concentrating,' Sakura thought angrily and watched him, rubbing her sore arms. Apparently training was over. Making up her mind she got up then sat cross legged in front of him. He didn't seem to notice her, or more likely, he ignored her. She took this chance to really study him._

_She remembered the short spiky haired psychopath he had been when she first met him and saw how little he had changed on the outside. His hair had grown a little and he was still short, but he had more defined features and muscles. If possible, he looked even more threatening, especially with the circles around his eyes expanding. 'He's probably still homicidal too.'_

'_But he hasn't killed me yet,' she countered, arguing with herself in her head. She wondered then why he hadn't. There was nothing she could offer him, and there was no way he was just being nice to her, so why was he helping her?_

_Pushing aside those thoughts she found herself tuning into his breathing. It seemed strange to hear something so normal coming from a man like Gaara. His breathing was deep and calming and she soon began to breathe with him, drifting into a half waking, half sleeping state._

Gaara opened his eyes when he no longer heard the girls breathing and noticed immediately that it was because she was breathing at exactly the same time as he was. She had gone into the same meditative state he went into instead of sleep.

He felt a muscle in his cheek spasm a little as he closed his eyes and returned to that peace.

_Sakura scrambled back when she realized Gaara's face wasn't more than an inch away from hers. Noticing a sore spot on her forehead she rubbed it while glaring at him._

"_You meditate too deeply," he said with a half smirk, as though his muscles couldn't quite form the expression. "Anyone could have just walked up and killed you."_

_Sakura shuddered, knowing who that 'anyone' would have been. And here she was depending on him to bring her to safety._

_Gaara stretched up from his crouch in a catlike manner and walked to the edge of the oasis' shelter. "The storm has passed." He announced and kept walking, leaving Sakura to scramble after him. 'Inconsiderate little turd!'_

_As they walked Sakura imagined Gaara with facial expressions. None seemed to fit him so well. She tried not to laugh, imagining him surprised, with that lovesick look she knew was so often on her own face. She imagined him as a child, caught with his hand in a cookie jar. 'But if Gaara was caught doing anything wrong it wouldn't be that, it would be…'_

_Sakura stopped thinking before she could imagine a four year old Gaara with blood all over his shirt._

Gaara noticed her breathing deepen as they walked. Soon it was as deep as their breathing had been during meditation. He almost turned to tell her to keep up, but then he realized she hadn't slowed down. She was meditating while walking.

'How impractical,' he thought, 'If she wasn't led in the right direction.' But in this situation, it was good. She would be able to keep walking without needing to sleep, and she wouldn't talk. How very perfect.

He walked on surrounded by blissful silence. If they could just keep moving they would reach the village by tomorrow.

Unfortunately she did eventually wake up. A sharp intake of breath was the only warning he had, then her breathing returned to normal and she spoke.

"Wow," she said. Gaara paused for a moment to wait. Her movements were much smoother than before and he could see that her body was healing much faster, as it does in a meditative state.

"I feel great!" she smiled, and the sun glared off her teeth. She walked alongside Gaara, "So, much farther to go?"

It might have been considered a complaint, but the idiot girl sounded so cheerful it really couldn't. So Gaara chose to ignore her.

_Sakura would normally have hated the way he ignored her, but she just felt so calm. She grinned, thinking it was also probably because it was Gaara doing the ignoring and it would not be a good idea to go off on him._

_She stretched and rolled her shoulders, trying to dispel that dull aching feeling in between her shoulder blades. She noticed Gaara glaring at her, but continued her movements, deciding she didn't care._

_Unconsciously she started humming quietly, a song had taught her years ago, 'When she was still around.'_

_Sakura shook away those negative thoughts and turned to something positive. She would soon be out of the desert. She could almost feel the cool air of Konoha village, just thinking about it. Away from this hot dry air, this damned sand, Gaara and her unbelievable sunburn._

_She snuck a look at him as she thought of him, as though afraid he had learned to read minds since their last encounter. Seeing no change of expression in his raccoon eyes she turned back to watching for any sign of civilization._

"_Would you stop that?" Gaara burst out suddenly._

_Sakura was so surprised by the sound of his voice she stopped dead in her tracks. Suddenly she was afraid of him, sure he would kill her now. She shut her eyes tightly against the sight of him, waiting for that horrible feeling of sand wrapping itself around her. But on the insides of her eyelids she saw images even worse than Gaara. Before she could make a noise she bit her lip and opened her good eye._

Gaara saw her shaking and closing her eyes. 'Finally,' he thought, she realized how much she should fear him, but the thought came with annoyance. The stupid girl; he had just wanted her to stop her infernal humming but she had to go off and throw a fit. This wasn't how it should have happened.

The smell of blood filled his nostrils as she bit her lip open. 'Why was she always doing that?' He breathed through his nose, forcing the smell out. When she opened her eye he was forcing away thoughts of her death. He wasn't having much success so he walked away. He knew that killing her now wouldn't happen anything like it did in his mind.

He had walked a fair distance before she caught up to him. Soon she was walking next to him, her smell permeating the air. The images in his mind became more vivid, bloodier, more violent.

He reached out suddenly and tapped her temple. She froze. Gaara stopped and told her they would stop here and train.

_Sakura lay awake, staring at the stars. They looked different here somehow. She felt tears well in her eyes thinking about home, but she refused to let them fall. She would not cry for anyone anymore; she had to be stronger._

_She reached her arms above her head and stretched out her legs. Her muscles were so sore from Gaara's training, but she was glad for it. Once she got back to Konoha she would train harder ever. She would never let this happen again._

_An annoyed sigh escaped her lips. She couldn't sleep, as hard as she tried. She had suggested to Gaara that they should keep going; she was up for it and she knew he was too. He still would not continue, said she was already too slow with overexerting herself._

'_What a dickhead,' she thought, 'But he has been helping you , so cut him a little slack. Besides, he's not emotionally mature enough to know what a dick he is.'_

_Sakura cackled mentally and felt herself finally drifting into sleep._

Gaara sat miles away, snapping the necks of small lizards. He loved setting them on the ground and holding them by their tails, watching their tails fall off and the lizards then scurry away, thinking they would make it to safety.

They never did.

His sand plucked a rather large bird out of the sky. It must have come from the village; they were close. The bird struggled uselessly as Gaara's hands tightened around it's neck. It's wings flapped in his face, but this succeeded only in increasing his pleasure. He found if he closed his eyes he could feel like it was another neck he was wringing, not wings, but pale broken hands fluttering against his face.

As the bird went limp Gaara relaxed with it, no longer feeling such a strong need to kill the girl. He didn't really understand why he refused to do such a thing. It would be a disappointment he knew. It was better to imagine how she would fight back; he even allowed himself to imagine she would last a few minutes against him, struggling to the last.

When he got back to the sleeping figure he felt even more sure he wouldn't enjoy killing her.

"Too easy…" Hands of sand rose from under her to wrap around her neck as she slept on. Gaara frowned slightly and the hands grew stronger. She didn't even try to fight back, didn't even react to this threat.

He could see the marks on her neck, hear how as her windpipe was constricted she had more trouble breathing. But aside from her breath no sound came from the girl. 'She won't even give me the satisfaction of begging for mercy,' he thought and the sand dropped away.

Gaara listened to her breath coming more regularly and sat down to meditate. 'It has been far too long since I've allowed myself to kill anyone.'


	3. Part 3

_As soon as Sakura woke up Gaara made her run through some quick drills and they set out again. 'Heartless bastard.'_

_Sakura blinked at the wavering desert. She knew it was the heat rising off the sand, but that rational part of her mind wasn't in power right now. She knew how useless how knowledge really was, thanks to Gaara._

_She bumped into Gaara when he stopped. Inner Sakura grumbled, but she was too thirsty to show anything on the outside. If she had, she would have shown surprise when Gaara held out his canteen to her. She mumbled a thanks before drinking from it._

_Only later after they had been walking for a while did she think about it, 'Gaara put his lips on that, and you drank from it. How gross.' Sakura had a hard time believing nay part of her could be so stupid. Gaara looked at her sideways when she snorted, but looked away quickly. Sometimes she was glad he ignored her._

_As the sun set Sakura was sure they would stop, but Gaara kept going._

"_We're almost there," he said flatly, and Sakura felt a new rush of strength. 'I can't wait to get out of your company either.'_

_As the village came into view Sakura felt her spirits rising. Night had fallen, but it was a though a ray of sunshine shone on her._

_They walked through the town silently. Everything was silent, in fact. Sakura glanced around nervously, "Where is everybody?"_

_A small man scurried past them , but he couldn't escape Gaara's sand._

"_Where can she get transportation?" Gaara demanded, holding the man up by his neck._

"_Go see the chief!" the man squeaked, "Everyone must-urk!"_

_Sakura stared as Gaara's sand started to strangle the man. She couldn't form any thoughts about it though, all she could think about was that she would be going home._

_She glanced up as Gaara threw the man away, still breathing she noticed. 'Gaara must really have mellowed out in few yrs.'_

_She followed him through empty streets to an elaborate double door. She snorted and entered the chiefs house after him._

_There were men in the first room. As soon as they entered one of the men went further inside. Sakura realized her hands were shaking and clenched them at her sides._

_She and Gaara were told to wait so they sat on chairs lined against one wall. It wasn't long before the same man who had left returned and said the chief would see them both separately. "The woman first."_

_Sakura hated the way the man looked at her, but she stood and followed him into another smaller room. There was a big man seated on a solitary chair at the other end of the room. Something inside her told her to run, told her horrible things about this man, but another louder part argued that she had never seen him before._

_Until he stood up and walked towards her she believed that louder part. Until he said, "Didn't get enough before slut? I know you couldn't say away." And Sakura's mind unleashed it's memories upon her._

'_Run away, run away, kill him.' Sakura found herself frozen in place, unable to do either of those things as the man approached. Moments of violence flashed through her mind. His hands on her face her throat, everywhere. Hands shoving her face in the sand, hands… She remembered that night in her bed, beaten and taken away in silence. Taken to this man so he could… He could-_

'_Rape, Sakura, the word is rape.' A voice inside her said as her whole body screamed at her to run away._

_The man stood right in front of her now; she could feel his disgusting breath on her face as he fingered her hair, saying "You'll always come back for more of me. You're my whore." He back handed her casually, throwing her light body back against the wall._

_Still she didn't move as that cruel little voice whispered to her of sex and rape and how dirty she was. 'Sasuke will never love you now,' it whispered, 'You're damaged goods.'_

_Sakura had had enough. "Fuck Sasuke." She said quietly and found her voice in the words. Before the man could take her voice from her again she screamed for Gaara._

Gaara sat in the room, twitching angrily as the men snickered at him. 'Kill them, kill them, kill them,' Gaara was used to the chant inside his head by now.

The girl's voice screamed his name. It seemed muffled, so far away, but he was sure it was her. The men were too.

They burst out laughing and gave Gaara even more looks. He stood threateningly, sand seeping out of his gourd. A few pulled out knives, still laughing at the boy trying to scare them.

"It's been far too long since I've killed anyone."

_Sakura grabbed at the hands holding her up against the wall. "You little bitch." the man hissed and grinned at her. Sakura wanted to claw his mouth out, but she settled for his eyes. As she tried to scratch out his eyes she aimed a kick at his groin, and it connected._

_He threw her away and for one second he was not watching her. It was the second Sakura needed. Ignoring her pain, she ran out the door. She ran through the hall blindly, hardly noticing Gaara and the men he was killing as she ran past. They didn't notice her either. As she ran outside she threw up her arms to shield herself from the sun. She almost ran past the camels, but she noticed them at the last moment and jumped on one._

_What thoughts went through her mind ad she rode away? None. Sakura denied herself that. She didn't want to think, 'Just run.'_

Gaara watched the girl riding away, knowing that he wouldn't have the chance to kill her now. The desert would take care of that.

"And good riddance," he muttered and went back to his life.

_When she rode into Konoha village it was raining. Sakura opened her mouth to let rain fall in it and lapped rain off her skin. Finally, she was home._

_First she went to see Tsunade to inform her of her return and ask if she knew where her friends were._

_Tsunade was so shocked to see Sakura she didn't speak for a full minute. "You made it back on your own?"_

_Sakura nodded._

"_What happened? We haven't seen you for weeks! Naruto and Kakashi went out looking for you, and Sasuke too." She gave Sakura a knowing look, but Sakura ignored it. "So, what did happen Sakura?"_

_Sakura considered a moment before speaking, "I was… kidnapped. I don't know why. I was brought to the desert, but not the Hidden Sand village, I don't think they had anything to do with this. I was beaten and dumped and left for dead, but I made it back." 'I'm home.'_

_Tsunade was struck by how coldly Sakura related the events. Sakura had never been an especially calm person. She decided to think of it later, "I'm sure Ino will be happy to see you safe Sakura."_

_Sakura brightened at the mention of her friend's name. Ino had given up on Sasuke when Sakura could not, and since then they had become friends again. Sakura bowed to Tsunade and left to find the blonde._

_She found her eventually, kicking a dummy to death. For a moment Sakura was afraid, but when Ino stopped kicking to flip back her hair, she rushed forward._

"_Ino!"_

_The blonde turned and when she saw Sakura her eyes widened. Sakura grabbed her and twirled her around, lifting the other girl off her feet, "I missed you!"_

_Ino had tears on her cheeks when Sakura put her down. "Everyone said you were never coming back," she whispered, "But I knew it couldn't be true. I knew you could never give up on Sasuke."_

For the lovely reviewers :

JohnnyG : Thanks for the advice. I need to practice my summaries, I agree.

Scorpion05: To answer your question: Sakura is about 17 when the story begins.

And to the others Thank you.


	4. Second Encounter

As with most any fanfiction, it is better enjoyed with complete disregard to the actual events, actions and even characters of the original story. And also a glass of milk.

Second Encounter

_Sakura loved baths. She loved hot baths, so hot it felt like her skin would burn and fall off. Sometimes she wished it would. To be reborn as the entirely new and pure person who lived under her skin; that was her wish. As it was, she was stuck in this body; a body that would never be fast enough or strong enough, no matter how hard she trained. The simple, cruel truth was that she had no talent, no inherent abilities to make her strong enough._

_So she had quit being a ninja. She hated the thought that she would never be good enough to be of any real use to anyone, that she would always be holding others back, so she found herself another job, something she could handle. Sakura opened up a jewelry shop, and she was surprisingly good at making her own jewelry._

_She still trained, as intensely as sheplanned. She was much faster and stronger than two years ago, but it just wasn't enough._

_Still, she enjoyed her life the way it was now. Making jewelry kept her occupied and she liked doing it. Making rings for happy couples, bracelets for tentative ones._

_Naruto and Sasuke lived next door to her apartment, in their own two bedroom place. Sakura lived alone in her tiny apartment, the only one she could afford, and she liked it that way. It was comfortable. It was nice having those two next door, pretending to be her guard dogs. Life was… nice._

_There were days when Sakura was left alone, when her friends went away on missions. And those days were okay too, she told herself. She would open shop earlier, work harder, train harder and longer, anything to keep from thinking. She had learned to appreciate silence, both in her surroundings and in herself. Of course, she still enjoyed her occasional rants._

_She sighed and ducked her head under the water to rinse her stubbly hair. Almost as soon as she had returned form the desert she had hacked it all off, sick of trying to be impressive. Now it stuck out at all angles; she looked like a fuzzy pink porcupine._

_As she got out and glanced in the mirror she swore she saw a face behind her. She spun around quickly with her fists out but only managed to slip on the wet floor and crack her head against the sink._

"_I need a bigger bathroom," she muttered, "And calmer nerves."_

_Within five minutes she had dressed and was out of the apartment on her way to work. The wonderful thing about owning her own business was that she could choose her own hours. The downside was that she was dirt poor._

_Sakura sat behind her counter calculating her finances when Naruto burst in._

"_The conquering hero has returned!" he yelled and bounced around the room. Growing up had done nothing to mature him mentally. Sasuke walked in behind him much more quietly._

"_It was an easy mission."_

"_Feel like celebrating?" Sakura asked, "Perhaps with some lovely anklets?" she held up a couple of flowery anklets as she said so and raised her eyebrows at the two._

_Naruto landed on the counter in front of her with his tongue out, "Don't you ever think about anything but work?"_

"_Hey, a girl's got to live," Sakura shrugged good naturedly. Naruto was always bugging her to lighten up, but she was unmoved by his words. 'I'm happy enough dink knob!' she thought and smirked. Naruto shrugged back at her and lay back on her counter._

"_Stop that! You'll scare away my customers you big pigface!" She grinned and kicked the two of them out of her shop, saying she needed to do finances, which she did._

_Sakura settled back behind the counter and lugged out the black folder, but she heard Sasuke talking an unusual lot outside so she went to make sure they weren't scaring away potential customers._

_She stepped outside and for a moment forgot to breathe when she saw who they were talking to. Someone who would definitely scare away customers._

"_Gaara." She breathed and his clear green eyes turned away from Sasuke to stare at her._

Gaara glared at the girl, noticing she had cut off all her hair. How very practical of her.

"You're still alive," he noted.

"You didn't honestly think the desert could get me did you?" she asked. Gaara wasn't sure if she expected an answer, but he didn't need to worry as Naruto interrupted his thoughts.

"What the hell are you talking about? Since when do you guys know each other?"

Gaara stared at Sakura, who returned his gaze without flinching. He wondered how much she hadn't told them.

"What are you doing here Gaara?" Sasuke demanded. He was always such a demanding little brat.

"Mission." Gaara was quickly getting sick of talking to these idiots, so he left in a gust of sand. "I'm just passing through."


	5. Third Encounter

This one is really short, but the next chapter should be soon!

Third encounter

_Sakura was in her office behind the shop carving a design into an opal bracelet when the door opened._

"_Good morning!" she said cheerily, "I'll be with you in a moment!"_

"_Good morning." Answered a familiar voice. Sakura stopped in the doorway at the sound. She had never expected to hear from him again, and he had appeared only three days ago and now he was back? 'Is he stalking me now?' She shook off her momentary panic and put on her business face._

"_How can I help you today, Gaara? Finally found yourself a girl you'd like to buy a gift for?" Mentally Sakura kicked herself. It was bad enough to say such a thing to a customer, but to Gaara on top of that? She really must be insane._

_She was sure of it when she thought she heard Gaara laugh seconds later, "Maybe I have," he said, his voice back to the normal emotionless level. "What do you have that she would like?"_

_Sakura was sure her jaw must be touching the floor. Gaara had a girlfriend? What the hell? Who would date such a psycho? But he said it with such seriousness she felt it must be true. So she gathered her wits together and acted as professionally as she could._

"_Does she have a favorite colour?"_

"_Red."_

"_Anything item in particular you're looking for? A bracelet would be best if you're not sure, or if it's serious," she nearly gagged there; "If it's serious you could get her a ring."_

_Finally Gaara decided on a bracelet made with ruby charms strung together. It was one Sakura was particularly proud of, with different kinds of birds making up the charms._

_When she had wrapped it up she handed him the bracelet._

"_How much will this be?" Gaara asked._

In the forest outside Konoha village Gaara ripped the bracelet apart, scattering the charms across the forest floor.

Why the hell had he bought the stupid bracelet? He had no one to give it to; no one would take them. Except maybe Temari, but he hadn't spoken to her for years; she might not even talk to him anymore.

Gaara glared down at the ruby birds lying scattered around him. Stupid charms. What a waste of money that had been. He really needed to get back to the desert; he was going insane. Completely insane.

Gaara drifted on the wind, making his way back slowly for all that he said to himself.

_Sakura veered off her planned course when she noticed something sparkling on the ground to the side. When she reached it and looked at it closely she realized it was one of the charms that made up the bracelet she had sold to Gaara._

'_I thought it was pretty…' she thought sadly and scooped up the charm, looking for the others, thinking she could make something out of them still. It was a pretty good deal actually. Gaara had given her money for jewels she got to keep._

'_Maybe his girlfriend dumped him,' she thought with a laugh, feeling better now that she had given him a reason to destroy her handiwork._

_Laughing softly she continued her run, holding the ruby birds in her clenched fists._


	6. Fourth Encounter

Fourth Encounter

What do you do when someone comes into your life and changes the way you lived it, if only for a few days? You get on with your life. Life goes on, even if it's only a twisted farce of a life.

Gaara had moved on. He had grown bored with living alone in the desert so he had moved back to a populated area and worked as a mercenary and now he was growing bored with that.

Gaara sat on a chair in an otherwise empty room and considered what to do next. He could always go on a killing spree but that no longer appealed to him as much as it used to. He had better control of his demon now.

It was the girl, Sakura, who had gotten rid of his boredom in the first place; maybe she could do so again. Yes, he should pay her a little visit and thank her for the bracelet, his girlfriend had loved it. He smirked at his own joke.

And if he was still bored he could always kill her.

_Sakura hummed as she closed shop for the night. On the way home she stopped to buy fresh vegetables and fruit. Sasuke and Naruto were away on a mission and Ino was going out with her boyfriend, so she would be eating alone tonight._

_Every night almost she came home to an empty house. Sometimes it was so depressing, 'I should get a pet,' Sakura thought._

_Still humming softly she set out her food and started cooking her meal. She had the water boiling when the front door creaked. Any of her friends would have called out hello when they entered so Sakura approached the door carefully. She couldn't see anyone in the front room so she closed the door, making a mental note to fix the door soon._

"_Your house isn't very nice. Maybe I shouldn't have come."_

_Before any thought registered in her mind, Sakura had thrown two kunai knives at the source of the voice and jumped to a window with two more knives in her hands._

_Gaara easily deflected the knives and Sakura watched them clatter to the floor with a sinking heart._

"_What are you doing here Gaara?" she asked, trying to seem relaxed, but her voice squeaked tellingly._

_He had gone back to inspecting her furniture but he looked back at her to speak, "Visiting."_

'_Visiting? Why didn't he tell me ahead of time or knock or warn me or ARG!' Sakura was seriously peeved, but she stepped away from the window and tried to appear calm. "Ever heard of knocking?"_

"_Yes." He replied._

_Sakura was about to answer back but she heard a sizzling noise from the kitchen. "Ah crap." She hurried to the kitchen to take the noodles off the flames. "Would you like dinner then?" she heard herself ask and mentally stabbed herself with a giant fork. What was wrong with her, asking Gaara to have supper with her? Was she really that lonely and pathetic?_

_Well, Gaara had helped her in the desert years ago, and she always made too much food anyway. 'As if that's a good reason to invite a psycho to dine with you.' Sakura told her mind to shut up as Gaara sat at the table, staying apparently._

"_So… what brings to you Konoha?" she asked as she set a plate in front of him._

"_Boredom." He sat and stared at the food as if it was about to jump off the plate and attack him._

_Sakura dug into her own plate. It wasn't anything fancy, she couldn't afford fancy food, but food just tasted so good when she made it herself. Food tasted good period. "It's not poisoned." She assured Gaara._

"_I'm immune to poisons."_

_Sakura glared at Gaara, "My cooking isn't bad if that's what you're worried about."_

Gaara watched Sakura eat a third helping of her dinner. It actually did taste good, but not that good, he thought. He couldn't remember ever being so hungry he would eat three helpings of anything, no matter how tasty.

Sakura saw him staring and made a face, "I'm hungry." She said and sat back, having finished her third portion. "Ah… nothing like a good meal."

'Now what?' Gaara asked himself, 'you're with the girl, what will you do now?' He was about to talk when she offered him tea. "Yes."

He followed her around the kitchen with his eyes. She was obviously much stronger than before, just as she had wanted. When she put the cup of tea on the table in front of him he wanted to say something, but could think of nothing so he was silent.

"So, are you on another mission?" she asked eventually.

"Yes." He lied.

"Oh."

Gaara was growing tired of her silence. He quickly gulped down the last of his tea and left.

"Goodbye!" she called after him as he raced away.

'That was stupid. She's just a boring, insipid, weak little… human! Just like the rest of them.' Gaara recognized the demon and silenced it.

_Sakura leaned against the closed door. Well, that was strange, to say the least._

_Suddenly she had a headache. Sakura turned off the lights as she made her way to bed. No more training today._

_As she lay in bed she couldn't help thinking about Gaara. Why hadn't he killed her? If he wasn't going to kill her, why did he come see her?_

'_Just be happy you're still alive. You can't know what Gaara's thinking.' But would she have been so angry if he had killed her? After all, what did she have to live for? Her shop? For gods' sake, she didn't even have a pet. She didn't really affect anything in this world. There was no reason to be happy to be alive._

"_Shut up!" Sakura yelled at that mean little voice and stuffed her head under a pillow, but of course that didn't stop it. 'Even your parents left you. Sure, say you're a woman now, tell yourself you left them to live on your own. What are you good for? Making jewelry. Being polite. Being polite to people you make rings for when you'll never get one for yourself. You hardly even exist.'_

Gaara watched as Sakura finally fell asleep then he stepped into her room. She looked so different now, since last time he had watched her sleep.

He could still see the scars from that beating, and others. Her short hair suited her, he decided, then realized what kind of thoughts he was having and stopped. 'Look at her. She's not attractive or interesting. Why did you come back here?'

Gaara found himself staring at her neck. It had been covered up during the day, but now he could see the full pale length of it. He wondered what it would be like to strangle her with his own hands, not sand. Before he had a second thought his hands were around her neck. She was so warm. He hadn't known how warm people's bodies were. He couldn't remember the last time he had touched anyone with his own hands.

Sakura's eyes opened suddenly and he realized what he was doing and jumped back, freeing her windpipe.

"_Gaara?" Sakura coughed. What was going on? Had he really returned during the night to kill her? "What were you doing?"_

"_I-"_

"_Don't answer. I know what you were doing." Sakura moved away from him slowly. He made no move towards her. Actually he looked kind of… scared. "Why are you in my bedroom?"_

"_I-" she watched as Gaara crouched on the floor and put his head on his knees. "I thought I was in control."_

_The sight of Gaara on the floor scared Sakura more than his hands around her neck. He must have been playing some sick mind game with her. She continued backing away until she bumped into the windowsill. Gaara still had not moved and he was no longer making any noise. "…Gaara?" she ventured. Why had she woken up?_

_He didn't move, but she could see his back rising and falling with each breath._

"_Gaara, you're not on a mission are you?"_

_He shook his head. Why wouldn't he look at her? At least then she would feel on familiar ground._

_She tried to steer clear of the killing Sakura subject. "Did your girlfriend like the bracelet?" As soon as she said it she remembered he had broken it, but it was too late to take it back._

_He started shaking. Sakura was ready to bolt out the window when he looked up and she realized he was laughing. He stood and crossed the room to stand in front of her and any thought of running fled her mind._

"_There is no girlfriend, Sakura," she hated the way he said her name, as though it belonged to him, "There is no one. Who would date someone like me?"_

_Sakura made a mental note to leave more weapons hidden in her room from now on, if she survived the night._

_Gaara was staring at her again. His gaze flickered down to her neck for a second, then he looked back into her eyes. "I didn't really mean to…" he stopped._

"_Why did you come here Gaara?" She tried to make her voice like his, tried to own his name._

"_I came for you."_

_Sakura's mind froze, as did her body. He came for her? So he really did mean to kill her then. She relaxed. 'Fine, if this is it.'_

_Gaara continued, "because I am so bored with everything and when I found you for a few days I wasn't so bored and I hate being bored."_

_Sakura wasn't really sure to take the information. Should she be flattered? Happy he didn't want to kill her? Afraid of boring him?_

"_I… amuse you?"_

Gaara sighed mentally. The woman was so dense. That wasn't it at all, but it was what she expected to hear, so he agreed with her.

"So… what now?"

What now? The demon inside told him to kill the woman before she told anyone about tonight. But it was the demon's fault he was in this mess anyway, and he didn't want to listen to that bastard.

He realized how long he had been silent when she spoke up. "Are you going to stay in Konoha?"

Gaara nodded. It was what he wanted, after all.

"Where will you stay?"

"With you."

"But-"

"I'm sure it's the least you could do." Without waiting to hear further protestation he swung off his gourd and leaned it against the wall. Then he went into the living room.

_Sakura stared at the gourd. She really wanted to touch it, but figured against it. Gaara would probably kill her if he found out, and he would find out. Plus it was made with people's blood._

_She settled her gaze on something safer, the ceiling. Gaara was staying with her no matter what she said. How crazy was that? She couldn't remember a moment in her life that could compare, except maybe the day she returned from the desert._

_But… Gaara? And a weirdly acting Gaara at that. The world was falling apart around her. It shouldn't be allowed to do that anymore._

_She hadn't thought it would be possible, but Sakura fell asleep with Gaara of the Sand in the next room._

Gaara sat on the couch and stared the wall. What the hell was he doing? He shrugged. He was insane; he could do whatever he felt like doing.

For hours he sat there until he heard Sakura waking up in her room. He turned to watch her as she entered the living room. When she saw him she paused and stared at him for a long moment.

"Good morning." She said finally and walked to the bathroom.

Gaara's mouth twitched in amusement. He felt better already. Sakura came back out of the bathroom and went back into her bedroom. Suddenly she popped her head back out and told him, "If you peek, or I find any stray sand in here I will kick you out!"

"Hmph." Perverted woman, she'd like that wouldn't she? Gaara turned his back to her door.

When she came back out she was dressed and groomed neatly. Gaara sat at the table as she cooked herself breakfast. She was humming again.

"Um… I guess, do you want eggs?" she asked.

"No."

Sakura shrugged, "Suit yourself." Then she flipped her eggs onto a plate and sat down to eat.

Gaara found himself staring at her neck again. He hadn't really noticed the pearly line of scars around her neck last night. He was sure he hadn't given her that scar.

Sakura stood up abruptly and put her dishes in the sink. "I'm going out, so you can just… amuse yourself." Before she left the apartment she buttoned her shirt up to the top.

**Dumdedum I am the author:**

scorpion05: Gaara is insane. He can do whatever he wants and I won't ask questions.

CallMeTemari: Oh there will be Sasuke bashing.. well not exactly, but you'll find out. Oooh. I never really liked him either.

And thanks tomad-killer-bunnies-alert!


	7. Part 2

_Sakura sat behind the counter, doing more finances. It felt like that was all she did lately. "Finances and housing madmen." She muttered and scratched the back of her neck. She really did need cash. She considered asking Gaara for money, but quickly dismissed the idea as insane._

_The chimes rang as someone entered._

"_Sorry, I just closed for the night," Sakura called sweetly, mentally wishing the loser would learn to read._

"_I know."_

"_Oh… Hey Gaara. Couldn't find anything more amusing than me?"_

_Gaara sat cross legged on the counter. "No."_

'_Don't look at him, don't look Sakura, don't-" Sakura looked up at Gaara. He wasn't looking at her, instead he was observing the shop. With a relieved shrug she bent back over her book. Gaara didn't move._

"_You know, my sister likes jewelry…"_

_Sakura looked back up at Gaara and waited for him to go on, but he didn't. He just kept on watching that invisible spot on the wall._

_She was just finishing when she felt his fingers in her hair. Reminded of other, more hostile handsdoing the same she jumped back against the wall._

"_Why did you do that?" she demanded, quickly assessing the situation. Gaara had his gourd, but other than that he was unarmed and she was well armed. She might have a chance to make a run for it._

_Gaara shrugged, never taking his eyes off her face, "I wanted to know what it felt like."_

_Sakura shook her head slightly. She knew Gaara wasn't very emotionally mature, but did he really just wonder what her hair felt like? He could well be playing mind games with her. She decided to do something very brave then; she decided to believe him. "Just ask next time ok?"_

"_Why would there be a next time? I already know what it feels like."_

_Sakurasat back at the counter and slouched over her book. She finished up quickly and stepped to the door, opening it for Gaara, "Have you eaten yet?"_

Gaara watched Sakura training from a safe distance. She had already trained for hours in the morning and now she was training again? The girl really needed to just give it up already. She would obviously never be as strong as she wanted, not without some sort of miracle. And at this rate she was going to injure herself.

He switched positions when his foot started to fall asleep. She really was determined. When she finally did stop it was because a blonde girl had come to talk with her. Gaara heard the girl's name as Sakura called to her. Ino. More useless information he would no doubt remember now.

Just as he remembered how easily Sakura had chatted with the man at the ramen stand. How she had smiled at him, as she smiled at everyone. He remembered sauce dripping down her chin in a very unattractive manner. He remembered the man had bony hands.

Gaara shook his head angrily, as if to shake out his thoughts. Ino had left and Sakura was going out for her run. The sun had set.

Gaara followed Sakura through her run, watching how smoothly she made her way along the bumpy forest floor. She ran in a loop around the forest and when she came back to the village she slowed to a walk.

He jumped down to walk next to her. She seemed unfazed when he appeared.

"Enjoy the show?" she asked, slightly out of breath.

Gaara was angry suddenly. She had known all along that he was watching and yet she had waited until now, so she could humiliate him? He almost broke her arm before restraining himself, not that she had noticed his restraint. She just continued walking, unconcerned.

She stopped and turned to him suddenly, "Honestly Gaara, I don't understand what you're doing here."

"I'm bored." He replied, feeling anger rising again.

"So you've said, and I get that you don't want to be bored, but I don't understand why you seem to think I'm so amusing. This is pretty much my daily routine. My life is as repetitive as the next person." She spread her arms wide to include the whole town.

Gaara stared at her face. She wasn't what his brother would have called pretty. Not like that Ino girl. He didn't understand her either. "I don't get it," he murmured.

Sakura's posture straightened, "What?"

"Nothing." Gaara turned and walked away, but it felt like he was running.

_Sakura blew bubbles under the water. She giggled when they floated up into her nose. She loved her baths, even if they were a luxury she couldn't really afford._

"_Maybe I can borrow money from Kakashi…" she sighed and wiggled her toes, telling herself to forget all about those things for now. There were more pressing matters at hand._

_Like this bath. And Gaara. Sakura didn't trust him, so much in fact that was wearing clothes to take his bath. Gaara probably wouldn't purposefully peep to be a pervert, but she wanted to be on the safe side. With his mind, he wouldn't know it was wrong._

_Gaara staying with her reminded her of the days she had spent in the desert, an experience she would like to have forgotten. Those days that Gaara had found so amusing._

_It seemed her thoughts called him, as he appeared seconds later, saying, "I haven't really killed anyone since then."_

_Sakura shrieked and ducked under the water, forgetting she was dressed anyway. While she was underwater she considered her options. She could surface and act like Gaara walking in on her bath was normal and ask what he was talking about, or she could yell at him. Better yet, she could just stay under the water until he went away; or forever. Maybe she would just stay under here until she ran out of air. It was kind of nice..._

_When she resurfaced eventually, gasping forair, Gaara was sitting at the edge of the tub, watching her face. 'At least he's not looking elsewhere,' part of her thought._

"Y_ou know it's not normal – or polite – to walk in on people while they're taking their bath." She told him._

"_I don't believe it's normal to bathe in your clothing," he retorted, looking smug, but Sakura blew up at him which he was obviously not expecting. Part of her was so happy to see that smug look wiped off his face._

"_So what? You walked in here, so it's a good thing I am wearing clothing! You were expecting me to be naked and you walked in anyway? You pervert! Get out of my house!" Sopping wet she pushed his unresponsive body towards the door, "I swear, you're worse than Kakashi! If I ever see you again I'll-" They were at the door now, so Sakura could see Sasuke and Naruto returning. "Oh shit."_

_Gaara looked behind him and back at Sakura with an evil smirk on his lips. She pulled him back inside and slammed the door behind him. 'What would they do if they knew Gaara was here?'_

"_The conquering heroes are returning," he said, pushing Sakura over the edge, "What will you do now?"_

_Sakura grabbed at Gaara's shirt collar, but his sand flew up quickly and threw her across the room before she could touch him. She thought she heard Gaara swear, but she wasn't sure._

"Shit." Gaara paced back and forth by Sakura's unconscious body. Gaara never paced.

He hadn't meant for that to happen. It was her fault- stupid woman- for grabbing at him like that. He didn't want to kill her; he had already decided that, but it seemed she wanted to die.

What now? She was breathing normally, but how long until she woke up? What if those two idiots came here and found her? If he didn't leave they would blame him.

'Because it is your fault.'

Should he move her? He should put her on her bed right? Then if her friends came here, they would assume she was sleeping.

He picked her up and carried her to her bed. It felt so weird holding her in his arms, but kind of…nice. When she was lying he lay down beside her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She was so warm despite being wet. He thought of another time, long ago when he had been close to such warmth.

Sakura rolled over and started to wake up. Gaara quickly backed away, unsure if he should leave. She would blame this on him, tell him to leave; she would hate him.

He didn't want that. He would explain it to her, she would understand. She would forgive him and everything would be just fine.

"I didn't mean to." He said simply as Sakura opened her eyes.

"Oh, that was an accident was it?" she said and rubbed the back of her head, "It felt pretty purposeful to me."

Gaara felt anger and despair rising in him, along with something new. Before Sakura could say how much she hated him, he ran away and this time there was no doubt that he was running.

"_Wait, Gaara…"_

_Sakura noticed she was in bed, and she was wet, and he was gone. He ran away from her. She blinked at the room around her, feeling strangely lonely._

'_Good riddance I say!' shouted her mind and she was inclined to agree with it. She should have been._

_There was a knock at the door. Sakura got up to open the door and was greeted enthusiastically by Naruto. "Hey Sakura, how you been?"_

"_Hey Naruto. Sasuke." Sakura nodded at him and stepped back to allow the pair in. "How'd it go?" she asked while puttingthe kettle onto boil, out of habit._

"_Sakura, you're all wet!"_

_She looked down at the puddle forming at her feet and laughed, "So I am." She walked back to her bedroom to change into dry clothes._

_When she came back out Sasuke was pouring tea into cups while Naruto played with something she couldn't see. When he noticed her he held it out. It was a little timer filled with sand. "We got it for you in the Sand country!"_

"_And when he says 'we' he means he got it himself." Sasuke added and slid a cup towards her._

_Sakura smiled gratefully. This was all she needed. A little companymade her feel all better. It had nothing to do with Gaara._

_When Sasuke and Naruto eventually left for the night Sakura was reluctant to see them go. She admitted to herself she was a little afraid of Gaara coming back and killing her in her sleep, but she said nothing to them._

_Sasuke hung back after Naruto had left, "Are you okay?" he asked softly._

_Sakura nodded._

"_Well, if you ever need us…" Sasuke smoothed back a piece of her hair, a very unusual gesture from him, "We're still your teammates."_

"_Thanks Sasuke." Sakura smiled and said goodnight then went back inside. But her apartment felt too dark and cold again, so she locked the door behind herand headed to Ino's._

_Ino opened the door in a man's shirt. Part of Sakura was annoyed with Ino, but mostly she was just happy to see her. "Hey Ino. Mind if I stay with you tonight?"_

"_Sure!" Ino grinned, "It's been too long since we've had a sleepover. I've just got to kick Mark out." Ino turned as Sakura mumbled at her back._

"_It just gets a little lonely sometimes you know?" She sighed as Mark walked out past her and Ino pulled her inside, "No, of course not."_

**I am author, hear me roar:**

Um, just a thanks again to everyone who has reviewed. This fic is going to end up being longer than I planned, I just know it.


	8. Fifth Encounter

Fifth Encounter

Determined not to follow Sakura anymore, Gaara searched for other ways to keep away the boredom. He had decided that boredom caused the demon inside to call louder for death, and the only reason the days with Sakura had seemed so much better was because of the killing he had done. Any killing he had done since then was strictly on a contract basis.

It had nothing to do with Sakura. She meant nothing to him. The life she lived was boring and futile.

Gaara tried to follow others. He had trailed Ino for almost a week, intrigued by her and the man she was always with. He couldn't figure out why the seemed to find so much pleasure in each others arms and then at night when they…

Gaara had never been told about sex. What use would it ever be to him? He had heard stupid jokes about it, and he understood some things; things everyone knew. Sex made babies.

He didn't think Ino wanted children.

He had soon grown bored with their repetitive behavior anyway, so he followed others. It seemed everyone in this town followed some useless routine. They all went through the same experiences every day. Gaara hated the thought of ever living like them.

So he decided to return to the sands. There was nothing for him in Konoha.

_Sakura put down her bags for the night. The nights here were much colder than the days. She remembered that much._

_Here, the Sand Country. She felt so stupid returning here._

'_I'm traveling,' she told herself for the umpteenth time that day, 'If I'm going to be lonely, I might as well be alone.'_

_A week after Gaara ran away she grew fed up with her life and decided to take a break. She just needed some time away then she would be ready to go back. So she had closed up her shop, said goodbye to her friends in Konoha and left for a little alone time._

_Two weeks later she was back in the desert, and now that she was here she decided she wanted to go back to the town she had run away from. See what had become of it._

Gaara was stopped by Sasuke in the forest.

"What are you doing here Gaara?" he demanded.

Gaara refused to respond, only standing with his arms crossed across his chest.

Sasuke didn't take the hint, "You've been following Sakura, haven't you?" Gaara's eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly, "That's why she was so afraid, why she left."

She left? Where did she go?

Sasuke continued, "Leave her alone, or I'll stop you."

Gaara let Sasuke see his anger then, "You're a fool." He said and shifted his stance a little.

"Fine." Sasuke actually attacked Gaara. Before he could do anything he was engulfed in sand. He let the sand batter against Sasuke's eyelids, forcing him to keep his eyes closed.

"If I want to follow her, I will follow her." Gaara hissed at Sasuke, "If I want, I will kill her. You can't stop me." 'And you're wrong. Sakura isn't afraid of me.' He tightened the grip his sand had on Sasuke, slowly suffocating him.

Part of Gaara reveled in the feeling of killing, another told him to kill Sasuke faster, while his own self told him to stop, to gain control of himself.

'If you kill him now, Sakura will always hate you, more than she does now.' A voice whispered in the back of his mind. It was soon shut up and locked away, but Gaara had already dropped Sasuke and walked away.

"_You did this." Sakura murmured to the desert winds as she stood in all that was left of what had once been a town. Maybe the winds would carry her words to the one who had destroyed it._

_The buildings were flattened, flooded with sand from the years and from him. 'You know he didn't do it for you,' that cruel voice told her, but she didn't care. She was just glad it was gone. The bastards deserved all the pain he had shown them._

_After some digging around Sakura found the well and refilled her canteens. Some more searching uncovered some dehydrated food in a storage that was still intact. Sakura made herself a shelter with what was left of a building and started a fire as best she could._

_A flicker of movement caught her eye, her hand automatically flicked a kunai knife at it. Sakura approached her knife and found a lizard skewered on it._

"_Nice."_

_After a dinner of roasted lizard and some shriveled fruit Sakura settled down under her blanket, thinking happily of the fate of this town._

'_Now,' she thought, 'Now I can die and I will die satisfied.'_

Gaara hadn't expected her to ever return to the country of Sand, yet here she was, huddled in the shadows of buildings he had destroyed.

She seemed to be asleep. Didn't she notice the approaching sandstorm? Was she just stupid or did she want to die? Gaara realized that it looked like she did want to die, seeing as how nothing around her looked to have been touched for days. Had she been sleeping for so long?

He had told her he wouldn't touch her again, now that he knew what she felt like, but he wanted to touch her hair again. He forced himself to remains still until she woke up. She didn't move. Maybe he should wake her.

The sandstorm would be upon them soon, yet still she did not move.

Gaara felt something he had never felt before: worry. He checked her for signs of life, though he already knew she was alive. Her breathing was so slow; it was the kind of sleep you don't wake up from by yourself. The kind of sleep that leads to death.

Gaara called her name, but she didn't react so he shook her a little. He had to pour some water into her mouth to get her to wake, sputtering. She sat up quickly and coughed the water onto her knees.

Gaara let out a breath and she noticed him. "Gaara!" she backed away until her back was against the wall.

Gaara rolled his eyes and sat back on his feet. He would have let her speak first except… "There's a storm coming."

Sakura looked around and saw the storm. When she saw it she pressed further against the wall. "Well shit."

"I can shield you as well." Gaara offered.

Sakura eyed Gaara suspiciously but she nodded.

"You'll have to come closer."

Sakura moved to sit next to Gaara and just as they were hit with the natural sandstorm he put up one of his own to keep it at bay.

He sat beside Sakura and closed his eyes, concentrating a part of himself on the sand. He laughed silently at Sasuke. He had been afraid of what Gaara would do to Sakura? He couldn't even bring himself to touch her.

"You destroyed the town, didn't you?" Sakura asked.

"Yes." Gaara wasn't going to lie. If she was going to hate him, at least let it be for something he had done.

"I'm glad." Sakura pulled her knees up under her chin, "They deserved everything you did, and worse. Do you know what they did?"

Gaara didn't think he wanted to know.

But Sakura went on, "They raped me." Her voice was so cold, he was reminded of himself. Had he given her that coldness? "They took me from my home, they beat me, they forced me to have sex with them and then they laughed…" She hid her face behind her knees, but she kept talking. "I wanted to kill them all myself, except when they were talking, when they would say all those thingsto me, about me being weak and dirty and useless, it all made sense."

Gaara didn't really want to be there with her at that moment. He had no idea how to act, no idea what to say. He wanted to run again, but that would leave Sakura exposed to the storm.

_Sakura noticed Gaara shifting uncomfortably. "If you really want to go, just go. I won't be angry. I'd understand if you left."_

_Sakura felt sure she would cry, but it seemed she was too out of practice. Instead she just felt miserable. There really was no reason for her to live. Everything she could have wanted she had gotten. The death of those disgusting men, a job she was good at, even the love she had grown to want: none. What more could she reasonably ask for?_

_Gaara was silent. He didn't move. Sakura lifted her head to look at him. He wasn't looking at her. He was looking at the sand swirling around them._

"_This is what it feels like." He said._

"_What?"_

_Gaara turned to her. "You once asked me what it feels like inside a sandstorm."_

_Sakura stared at him blankly, "You remember that?"_

_She could have sworn she saw him blush before he turned back to the storm and shrugged._

_Sakura turned away and drank from her canteen. She felt better for some reason, knowing that Gaara remembered something she had said years ago. When she had her fill she handed the canteen to Gaara._

"_Are you injured?" he asked unexpectedly._

"_No I'm not…" 'Oh.' Sakura realized what it was and clamped her knees together. It was nearing that time of the month again wasn't it?_

"_Then whose blood is it? Was there someone else here?"_

"_No Gaara, it's just, um…"_

"_You're bleeding Sakura," Gaara turned to face her._

_Sakura could feel herself blushing and she hated it. How could he be so naïve? "Yes I'm bleeding! For gods' sake, I'm having my period."_

_Gaara gave her a blank stare, "What's that?"_

'_Is this guy for real?' Sakura tried her best to explain female anatomy to Gaara, but she had a hard time doing so._

"_So you're having a child?"_

_Sakura wondered if he was brain dead, but then she realized he hadn't had anyone to teach him these sorts of things. 'Things like the miracle of life, social finesse and how to talk to people.'_

"_No, I'm not having a child. If I was pregnant I wouldn't be having my period. And besides, I can't have children." Oh great, why'd she have to go and say a thing like that to Gaara?_

_But Gaara didn't say anymore. He turned back to watching the storm. For some crazy reason, Sakura went on. She guessed it was because she just wanted to tell someone, having kept it all a secret for so long._

"_Because they damaged me inside." Sakura winced at the truth of her words._

"_And outside." Gaara added._

_Sakura touched her throat. He knew it was scarred, he had touched it. He didn't know how she got them, but he could probably guess. Most of her scars came from here._

"Why did you do it?" she asked, "Why did you try to kill me?"

Gaara wanted to ignore her. He really, really wanted to walk away now, but still he wouldn't leave her to the storm. "I wanted to know what it felt like."

"You could have just asked." Sakura muttered.

"And what would your answer have been?" Gaara asked angrily, already knowing the answer. Sakura was silent.

They sat without talking for the duration of the storm after that. Gaara let down his barrier and stood to leave as the storm passed away. Being near Sakura was only frustrating to him. He doubted there was any hope she would stop hating him now.

"Wait Gaara!" she called and he stopped. She ran over to stand in front of him. The smell of blood was all over her. "Why did you come here?"

"I was just passing through."

"You mean, it had nothing to do with me?"

Gaara didn't answer. She would hate the answer if he told her the truth, which he would. Why should he lie to her?

When she next spoke though, she didn't ask him again. "Do you know why I followed you, when you found me out here?" She looked at her feet then back at him. He looked at her feet too. They were swollen and red from the sun. The skin on her big toe was peeling off around the toenail. "Because I knew that even if you did kill me, you wouldn't hurt me like the others had. Because I knew that you at least wouldn't humiliate me like that."

Gaara shook his head angrily, "You don't know that." He tried to get past her, but she blocked his way.

"I'm asking you not to leave Gaara. I just want you to stay with me, if only for a little while. Walk me home."

"…Where is home?"

_Sakura made Gaara turn away so she could change into clean clothes. 'What a lovely way to start the trip home,' she thought morosely, 'How will I explain this to everyone?'_

_She decided then to just screw it. She would tell them Gaara was her friend and he was staying with her. 'Is he really my friend though? What's to keep him from killing me in my sleep out of curiosity?'_

'_Well, if he was going to kill you, what difference does it make if he just happens to be living with you at the same time?'_

'_Ugh, living with me. It's going to be so awkward, if he does stay. People will think all sorts of perverted things about us.'_

"_Are you done yet?" Gaara asked, interrupting her mental battle._

"_Don't look!" she shrieked._

"_I'm not." He replied, and she believed him._

Gaara sighed inwardly. Sure, they might have had a nice 'moment' back there, but that didn't stop the silence from stretching between them. Sakura wasn't even humming. 'Good thing.'

Gaara had begun to wonder if they would walk all the way back to Konoha in silence when Sakura spoke up.

"So, what have you been up to?"

Gaara shrugged, "Hiring out my services."

"You must be pretty wealthy by now with your talents. Do you have a nice place?"

"Oh yeah, it's a pretty sweet pad."

Sakura made a strangled noise. Gaara suspected it was laughter.

Once she recovered she asked him again, "Ok, but seriously."

"I don't have a 'place' as you say. There's no point in my case."

Sakura shrugged, "It's just nice to have someplace to go home to at the end of the day."

"Whatever." Having never really had such a place to go home to, Gaara found it hard to agree with her. There was no reason for him to go anywhere at the end of the day; his days never really ended.

"So I guess you just travel all the time then?" she asked. Gaara wondered why she was asking so many questions. It was kind of annoying.

He chose to ignore her question, which she had already answered for herself. He remembered then what he had done before coming out here and finding her, "Sasuke will want to kill me."

Sakura snorted, "I'm sure he would." Gaara couldn't help grinning a little. So that had changed too since two years ago.

"Hey, do you think we could go back to that oasis? My water supply is getting pretty low." Sakura said.

"It's in the wrong direction."

Sakura rolled her eyes, "So let's go to an oasis in the right direction. I'm just telling you I need water."

_The water was lovely, Sakura decided. She wished she could heat it up and take a bath, but that would be such a waste. Water was too precious out here._

_This oasis was much smaller than the other, but that didn't bother her. She liked this one better actually._

"_Can we stay here tonight?" she asked of Gaara, who sat some feet away. She wondered again why he would bother following her anywhere._

_Gaara shrugged._

_Then again, maybe he hadn't followed her here. He hadn't answered him when she asked him about it. Sakura sighed and pulled off her sandals, deciding it was better not to ask him again. She dipped her feet in the clear water and smiled at the immediate cooling sensation. If Gaara had been someone else she would have suggested he do the same. Instead she lay back to watch the harsh cloudless sky._

"_You're unusually quiet." Gaara remarked. Sakura jumped; she thought he had been meditating. She actually hadn't expected him to say anything, let alone talk as pointless at this. It was just so unGaara-like._

_She rolled onto her stomach to observe him. He had not moved from his seat away from the water. "Do you not like water?" she asked, disregarding his comment._

"_Do you always ignore what people say to you?" he returned._

_Sakura shook her head angrily, "You're the one who's always ignoring people! Do you ever wonder why you don't understand them?" She would have gone on, but she seemed to have struck a nerve. Cautiously she approached Gaara, who had closed his eyes. "You do, don't you?"_

"_No."_

_Sakura sat back on her feet and watched him. He was like a child when it came to some things. "You're a bad liar."_

_He opened his eyes to glare at her, "Shut up." But she wasn't so afraid of him anymore that she would run away. Instead of shutting up and backing away as he wanted she crawled up and sat next to him, purposely looking at the water as he glared at her._

"_What do you want?"_

_Sakura shrugged, "I already told you. I just want you to walk home with me. I'm not expecting anything from you."_

"_Expecting anything?"_

_Sakura blushed, glad Gaara was himself at that moment. If it had been someone else they would have thought she meant she wasn't expecting… anything romantic, she finished weakly, unable to even think of what they would really want. Funny how plainly she could speak of it out loud, but in her mind she couldn't even say it._

Gaara noticed Sakura wasn't paying attention anymore and decided to let her be. So he started to meditate. If he was meditating she probably wouldn't bother him, he told himself.

For some reason he was having a hard time meditating. His mind was maddeningly occupied with the woman sitting next to him. She wasn't touching him, but he could feel her there, the faint heat from her body. He could feel her hair in his fingers, her neck in his hands…

He regretted that. He could no longer even imagine killing her, but now she would always be so wary of him.

'So what? So what if she's wary of you? What are you going to do to her that would be better if she trusted you?' Images of Sakura telling him her reasons for following him jumped to mind. He had at least that much trust from her.

'Listen to yourself, worrying about the trust of some pitiful little girl. What's gotten into you? We should kill her!"

Gaara recognized his demon and shut it up.

His eyes snapped open when he felt someone touching his hair. When he turned to face her, she dropped his hair and jumped back into a defensive crouch.

After a tense minute she grinned at him, "I just wanted to know what it felt like."

_Sakura watched Gaara's back nervously. She had no idea what to say anymore. She wasn't even really sure what had happened last night. He acted like it was nothing, but surely she couldn't just get away with touching his hair._

_He hadn't said anything, or done anything really. He just went back to meditating and then in the morning she woke up and they left._

_Sakura felt ready to scream. She held it back at first, but then she thought, 'Why not?' They were in the middle of nowhere, no one around for miles and miles, so there was no reason to hold back. She threw back her head and yelled as long and loudly as she could._

_Instantly she was wrapped in sand and for a moment she panicked, thinking that now he was going to kill her. She soon realized she wasn't being squeezed to death; she wasn't being squeezed at all._

_Then Gaara's face appeared through the sand, glaring at her, "Why did you do that?"_

"_Because we're in the middle of nowhere, and I haven't had that luxury for too long," Sakura said with a grin and immediately Gaara's sand fell away and he turned back to the invisible path he was following. Sakura followed a bit more slowly._

'_What was that all about?' she wondered, 'Was he worried for me? Aw, how sweet.' She laughed out loud at the thought._

'Now she's laughing at you,' the demon laughed.

'Shut up.'

'Why don't you tell her that. She's getting on my nerves. Better yet, how about you shut her up yourself?'

Gaara pushed the demon out of his thoughts. He had agreed with it too much in the past, now it thought it could control him. Well, it couldn't.

Gaara waited for Sakura to catch up with him. He started walking again once she had, matching his stride to her own.

"Almost there," Sakura commented.


	9. Part 2

_When they stopped outside Konoha village Gaara disappeared. Sakura sighed in annoyance. "Get back here!" she called. 'Coward.'_

_Gaara returned sullenly. Sakura smiled encouragingly at him, "Just don't kill or maim anyone and everyone will like you just fine." She said gaily._

"_That's exactly what I'm not looking forward to." He muttered and followed her through the town to her apartment. She stopped outside to get her keys and noticed that Naruto and Sasuke were out, thankfully. She didn't really want to deal with them just yet. All she wanted now was to flop down on her bed and sleep._

_She nearly peed herself when she opened the door and Naruto jumped out at her. "Welcome home!" he yelled and hugged her, "We missed yoooo!"_

_Sakura waited for him to attack Gaara but he didn't. Neither did Sasuke or Ino or Kakashi, all of whom were smiling at her obnoxiously, sitting on her furniture. They weren't reacting to him at all. She turned back and realized Gaara had disappeared again. Naruto tugged her inside and gestured at the half eaten food set out. "I was really hungry," he whispered apologetically to her behind his hand._

_Sakura smiled at them and sat down cautiously, "What's this all about?"_

"_We're welcoming you home!" Ino smiled widely, showing off perfect teeth, but Sakura was no longer jealous. "Like the idiot said, we missed you."_

"_Are you sure there's nothing else…?" Sakura eyed Kakashi, who she hadn't seen in a long while. When she had quit, they lost touch completely. Now he was sitting in her chair, smiling lazily._

_Ino shrugged and sat back against Mark. Sakura turned her focus to Sasuke, who smiled a little and offered to make tea. "Yes thank you." Sakura said, still a little in shock about the way her return had happened. This must be about something else._

The air in Konoha was too damp, Gaara decided. He didn't like it. So why was he back here again? What was he expecting to happen?

He looked through the window to see Sakura surrounded by her friends. He realized he was growling and left to find a nice quiet spot.

He found in on the roof of a tall building, out of sight of people passing by below. Having nothing better to do, he meditated.

_Sakura found herself alone in the kitchen with Kakashi. She felt strange with him for some reason. 'And we used to get along just fine. It was never weird with him.'_

"_So, how have you been?" she asked politely, perched on the edge of the table._

"_Fine," his own limp, flowing posture was a sharp contrast to her own awkward, straight angled limbs. He leaned lazily against the counter watching her with his heavy lidded eye, "How about you?"_

"_Alright I guess." She shrugged, "Not much money, but at least I can afford my own place right?"_

_Kakashi nodded and Sakura relaxed noticeably. Kakashi had always had that effect on her._

_He pushed away from the counter to stand closer to her, "Listen Sakura," he said quietly, "I'm not just here to welcome you home."_

"_Didn't see that one coming." She muttered sarcastically._

"_I hear you've been with Gaara of the Sand." He said, "In fact, we saw you just outside the village with him. I take it you know him?"_

_Sakura shrugged, "A little."_

"_We want you to take another mission, even though you quit. You won't have to do any fighting I promise, well I hope. We just want you to get some information from Gaara. Specifically, what he's been doing for the past two years."_

"_He said he's been doing freelance work…" Sakura quieted, remembering what else he had done, "Why?"_

"_We suspect a group of Sand nins is planning to attack. Unaffiliated with the official Sand country we hope. And since Gaara is no longer part of that country, we just want to know if he is involved."_

"_I can't…" Sakura started, but he cut her off._

"_I believe in you." He said and smiled, "You just have to put up with him for one month. If you haven't learned anything from him by then, you probably never will and that will be that. We'll forget about it, and still pay you. Much less though, you understand." He paused before continuing, "I'm sure you could use the money."_

_Sakura nodded slowly, after, what's the worst that could happen? 'He could kill you and then come back with his rebel group and destroy the country.' But Sakura was so reassured by Kakashi and his faith in her that it didn't really bother her. Stupidly. "A month then." She agreed._

"_Good girl!"_

_Sakura sat still as he left the room, and as soon as he was gone she kicked herself. She should have said no right away and left. Instead she had agreed to this because Kakashi said he believed she could do it? 'What a sap I've become.'_

_She went back into the living room and yawned widely, "I've had a nice time you guys, but it's getting pretty late, and I was walking all day…"_

_Kakashi grinned, "Alright, we're going."_

_They all left but Ino. She had sent Mark home and stayed to help clean up. Sakura smiled a little. It was obvious who wore the pants in their relationship._

_Ino dumped the dishes in the sink and sat on the table, having done the most housecleaning she ever did. She sat back to enjoy watching Sakura wash the dishes._

"_So Sakura, I hear you've been hanging out with Gaara," she grinned, "How long has that been going on?"_

_Sakura shook her head at Ino, "I know what you're thinking and nothing happened."_

_Ino pouted, "And I was so looking forward to some juicy gossip. Can you imagine the look on people's faces if I told them you and Gaara had hooked up?" she laughed at the mental image, "Really, Sakura, I know you would never do anything like that. You've hardly even spoken to Sasuke since you quit, and we both remember how you used to be with him."_

"_Well, he doesn't talk to me." Sakura retorted, scrubbing furiously at a plate she had been cleaning for three minutes._

"_Don't change the subject." Ino said and sat forward, "What's he like?"_

_Sakura shrugged, "He's quiet." She turned her back to the dishes and dried her hands on a towel, "I think he's… gaining sanity."_

_Ino laughed, "You have such a pretty way of putting it. Do you mean to say he's stopped killing people for fun?"_

"_Well he didn't kill me."_

"_So how long did you spend with him?"_

_Sakura sat beside Ino and leaned her head on the blonde's shoulder. She felt so empty, not tired physically, but mentally. Ino patted Sakura's short hair into place, "Are you okay?" she asked._

_Sakura nodded, "I miss when we were younger, when we were going for our chuunin exam."_

"_When we were still feuding?"_

"_Exactly." Sakura laughed with Ino. When their laughter died neither of them spoke for a while._

_Ino was the one to break the silence, "Well! I better be heading home. I'll let you get the sleep you so obviously need." She kissed Sakura's head and left. "Goodnight!"_

"_Goodnight." Sakura closed the door and leaned her forehead against it, enjoying the smooth hardness of it pushing back against her. She didn't really feel like sleeping, though her limbs were so tired they felt like they would fall off at any moment. She should go find Gaara before he left again._

_Sakura shrugged on a light jacket and left out the back door, jumping lightly across rooftops to find Gaara._

"Gaara. Gaara come on, if you're going to meditate you should at least do so inside. It looks like rain."

Gaara opened his eyes to see Sakura crouching nearby. When she saw him open his eyes she smiled, "I was just kidding about the rain actually."

Gaara liked her smile, even if it was kind of crooked. He stood and she stood with him.

"Would you like to stay?" she asked, "Or do you have an important engagement waiting for you elsewhere?"

"I have nothing else to do." Gaara replied, wishing he could think of a good reason to stay with her. Failing that, he remained silent.

Sakura shifted her footing, "So you're staying then? Then let's go, I'm falling asleep on my feet."

Gaara followed her back to her apartment, even though he already knew the way and could have beaten her there. They went in through the back door and Gaara noticed once again that her house wasn't in good shape.

Sakura yawned and went back into her room, "See you in the morning. We'll discuss your rent then." She disappeared behind the wall.

Gaara leaned his gourd against the wall and sat near the wall to wait.

_As soon as Sakura woke up she regretted doing so, remembering last night._

"_Stupid Gaara, why'd you have to go and help me in the first place?" she muttered, pulling on her shorts, "You should have just left me to die."_

_Still yawning she made her way to the kitchen for breakfast. Gaara was sitting by the door, for all appearances meditating. Sakura finished her meal quickly and left the house quietly, trying not to disturb Gaara. 'As if he's not disturbed already,' she thought with a smirk._

_The sun hadn't yet risen as Sakura made her way to the forest for her morning run. She breathed in deeply. Mornings like this were the reason she woke up at such an unnatural hour. The air felt so clean, almost new. Like it hadn't yet been breathed by anyone but her._

_As she started running the sun started its journey across the sky. Sakura ran until her legs were warm and then she ran a little more. Once she had finished she went through her daily training routine adding a few more patterns as she felt good this morning._

_She finished her routine and headed to the stream for a quick wash. It wasn't much of a stream, hardly a creek really, but the water was clean and that was all she needed. Sakura smiled at the sensation of cold water splashing against her face and lay back in the moss._

_In the tree right above her, standing on the underside of a branch some fifteen feet from the ground was Gaara. Sakura remembered the first time she had seen him had been just like this, yet so very different. She wasn't so afraid of him today._

"_Come on down!" she called, smiling at his glare. Gaara let go off the tree and flipped down to land softly beside her, "Showoff." She muttered and he snorted._

Gaara sat on the stool and watched Sakura working. If he was prone to such tendencies as tapping fingers, he would be doing so now. She had forced him to come inside when she found him outside, scaring away her customers. 'It's not my fault.' he thought angrily. 'Stupid people.'

He noticed she didn't get many costumers anyway. Her job had to be the most tedious job ever. It was for him anyway, she worked on jewelry all day long.

They both looked up as the bell above the door chimed.

"Good morning Sakura!" Ino called.

Gaara would have left but Sakura gave him a look that suggested he stay. So he did. If Ino freaked and something happened he would not be held responsible for it.

Ino stopped when she saw Gaara, looking from him to Sakura with a confused look on her face.

"Ino, you remember Gaara I'm sure?" Sakura said, as though introducing an old acquaintance.

If there was one thing Ino deserved credit for it was her talent for covering up any unpleasant thoughts she might, and was having. "Of course, how could I forget?" she said with a dazzling smile for Gaara. Or at least, he imagined it was, for people who were affected by such things; he knew it was fake. He watched warily as she walked up to the counter.

"What can I do for you today?" Sakura asked, leaning in towards Ino.

"I need something nice for my dear Mark. It's our anniversary, or something silly like that." Ino continued grinning like an idiot. Gaara had a sudden urge to pull down the corners of her mouth, but he squashed the feeling.

When Sakura and Ino had found something suitably manly for Mark Ino left and Sakura closed the shop. "You can go outside now." She said and wrote in her book for a few minutes then grabbed her jacket and they left.

Sakura stopped in front of the ramen stand as they were walking past. "Normally, I would never do this because I've so dirt poor, but why don't we celebrate a little?"

"Celebrate what?" Gaara wondered out loud, their return to this hateful little village, the fact that Sakura's friends all wanted him dead?

"My being able to afford it," Sakura said, "Now that I have your rent money." She grinned and Gaara wondered if she actually expected his money.

Gaara agreed to eat out and they sat to order. When they food came Gaara took a mouthful and nearly gagged, "What is this?"

Sakura laughed while the stall owner glared at him. He glared back, and he was better.

:Just keep eating," Sakura told him, "This crap really grows on you." She winked at the owner, who snorted and turned his back to them.

Gaara watched Sakura, strangely fascinated by the way she acted. She seemed so easy with everyone, yet Gaara knew she must be afraid. She had as good as admitted to him that she was afraid of men. 'But not of you. She must not consider you a man.'

Sakura had already half finished her bowl. She turned to Gaara and noticed how little he had eaten. "I hope you're not trying to savor it." She said, "You have to eat it as quickly as possible to really enjoy."

"I'm not hungry." Gaara replied truthfully. After having a bite of that he would never be hungry again.

Sakura took his bowl and dumped the contents into her own. "I'm sure you don't mind then."

Gaara blinked at her. She was eating his food. No one had ever dared to do such a thing before. If she had done it two years ago he would have crushed her skull, but as it were he just watched her in stunned silence.

Sakura soon finished and they headed back to her apartment. Sakura opened the door and glanced quickly at Sasuke and Naruto's window. "Looks like they left." She muttered and went inside.


	10. Part 3

**I thought everyone understood this, but apparently not, so: Italics are Sakura, normal writingis Gaara. **

**Would anyone prefer it if I put stars between them or something?**

**Thanks to everyone who has reviewed!**

**Yar, sorry this took a while to upload, it was actually ready a few days ago, but due to ADD I am very easily distracted, and I have the memory of a goldfish. Anyhow, hopefully enjoy!**

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_Sakura guessed she could probably get in a few more hours of work out before bed. She went into her room to change and came back out to tell Gaara where the food was._

_When she came out he had taken off his gourd and leaned it against the wall and was stretching to inspect her walls. She paused in the doorway, noting how much smaller he seemed without his gourd. 'I'll bet he's not much taller than me.'_

_Sakura crossed the room to stand right behind him. She was actually taller than him, by a fraction of an inch. 'Too bad size means nothing.' She thought mournfully. If it meant anything she would be stronger than him at least, though not stronger than many others. Everyone had outgrown her, in so many ways._

_Gaara turned to look at her out of the corner of his eye, "I'll go with you."_

_Sakura blinked and realized how close she was standing to him and stepped back with a muttered apology. Then what he had said processed in her brain. "What?"_

"_Don't worry, I won't bother you."_

'_Yeah I'm sure you won't.' she thought. She remembered when Gaara had trained her in the desert. It had been good training, but she didn't want to put up with that humiliation from the man she would have to spend the next month with._

"_Ok." She agreed and they went out again._

"Yo Sakura!"

Gaara looked up at the sound of Naruto's voice. He and Sasuke had been gone for a week now, and he had begun to hope they had died on whatever mission they were on.

"Hey Naruto," Sakura called, "You better be here for business!"

Whatever Naruto was going to say was never said as he stared at Gaara with his mouth hanging open. For maybe a millisecond. "Sakura look out!" he yelled and started to move but Sakura jumped over the counter to pin his arms to his side with a weary sigh.

"Yes, I noticed Gaara there already, idiot." She said, "He's my guest Naruto, so you had better act appropriately," She turned to Gaara, "As long as he does."

Naruto shrugged as she let go of his arms and turned to her, "Yeah, I've got business for you! I need a bracelet!" Talk about ADD.

Sakura nodded. Gaara marveled at her patience. "Who for?" she asked.

Naruto fidgeted, "Um… well." He whispered 'Hinata' into her ear as though Gaara couldn't hear anyway. As though he would actually care.

"Ok then," Sakura clapped her hands together, "Are your intentions pure?"

"Of course!" Naruto exclaimed. Gaara grimaced at a mental image of Naruto and any girl.

"Is Sasuke back too?" Sakura asked as she gave Naruto a pearl bracelet at a very discounted price. Gaara frowned at the mention of Sasuke. Naruto didn't notice. 'What a numbskull.'

"Yup, he's back! He went to talk with the Hokage. He'll probably stop by later."

Sakura stopped by the door with Naruto. Gaara didn't see their faces as Sakura told Naruto, "If you see him, tell him not to come by here. I'm going to close up now."

_Sakura ran through the forest faster than usual, enjoying the feel of branches slapping her legs, reminding her she was still alive. She stopped only when she heard a snap. "Was that you Gaara?" she called, knowing better herself. Gaara had trained nearby her for a week now, and he never made any noise._

_He still made no noise, and so she kept running._

_She jumped up suddenly when a giant snake lunged at her. Landing neatly on the underside of a branch she aimed two shuriken at the snake's eyes and jumped back again as it's tail smashed through the branch she had stood on a split second ago._

_Sakura made quick work of the snake; soon it was lying motionless as she inspected its body. Snakes didn't usually appear in this part of the forest. She shrugged; they could move as much as any creature if they so chose. She would tell Tsunade when she got back to the village._

_When she finished her evening routine Gaara appearedbeside her,as he always did. She wondered if he actually did anything, or if he just followed her around._

_They walked back to the village in silence. Sakura knew she should be making more of an effort to talk to him and find out what he had been doing, but she didn't want to push him now. Somehow she had become comfortable with his silence beside her._

_When they got back to her apartment Sakura made dinner and they ate. Since Gaara had been givingher money she could make better meals. Halfway through the meal there was a knock at the door. Sakura answered it; it was Sasuke._

"_Can I talk to you Sakura?" he asked, looking at Gaara. Sakura nodded and closed the door on Gaara._

"_Let's go for a walk, shall we?" They walked away from the apartment slowly._

_Sasuke cleared his throat before he spoke, "Sakura, are you and Gaara…um…"_

"_No." 'Absolutely not!'_

"_Ok." Sasuke nodded, "Here's the thing. I really don't trust Gaara, but that has nothing to do with what I'm going to tell you, ok?"_

_Sakura nodded nervously._

"_Since… I'm not sure when, I've felt like we… We should be together." Sasuke faltered, he who was always so blunt with his words. He reached out to touch her cheek and she flinched. Not because of Sasuke; there wasn't much contact she could stand. Still she felt horrible for acting likesuch a cowardwith Sasuke. After all, he had no idea what had happened to her. No one knew._

_Sakura shook her head, "You're a bit too late Sasuke. Two years too late." Inside she was yelling at herself. 'This is the chance you've always wanted! This is what you've been waiting for since you were children! So why the hell are you saying no now?' Because she knew that if she said yes, they would only end up hating each other, and she really didn't want that._

"_Right," Sasuke nodded, "Well don't I look stupid?"_

_Sakura smiled and tried to lighten the mood, "Don't worry, I'm the only one here, and I promise not to tell anyone."_

_Sasuke smiled, "You be careful with Gaara ok?"_

"_Sure."_

_He looked back at the way they had come. The apartment wasn't far, "I think I interrupted your meal. You should get back before he eats it all."_

_Sakura watched him walk away and turned back home, 'Boy, are you a fool girl!'_

"_Oh shut your trap."_

Gaara listened to Sakura throwing things in the other room and stomping around and making angry noises. There was a loud crash followed by what was probably her kicking the wall repeatedly. She had come home and locked herself in her room and stayed in there. That had been a half hour ago now, and she was still as angry as she had been when she first went in there by the sound of it.

Finally the door opened and she joined him on the couch. They sat and stared at the wall for a while.

"You should have healed by now," Gaara said.

Sakura sighed, apparently what he had said meant something to her. He himself hardly understood what he meant by it. "Sometimes it just doesn't get any better."

"No," he disagreed, thinking of his own life, "It always gets better at some point. Sometimes it just takes realizing that nothing matters, and it will be better."

Sakura turned her head to give him a funny look out of the corner of her eyes, then she turned back to the wall. "Well, some things never heal."

Gaara wondered what she was talking about now, or if she even knew. He certainly didn't, but it seemed to make Sakura feel better, so he was quiet.

"I left your dinner on the counter."

_Sakura looked at the plate without feeling any desire to eat it. All she wanted now was to climb into bed and maybe stay there for a few months. Yeah, that would be nice._

_And she would like to thank Gaara somehow. He was, surprisingly, a very good roommate. Better than Ino would have been. He had cleaned the kitchen and done the dishes after he finished and he didn't take up much space around the apartment. Really, he only needed room for his gourd. That didn't stop him from creeping her out a little still._

_Sakura packed up her food for tomorrow and went back to the living room to say good night to Gaara. When she got there his eyes were closed, but instead of just saying goodnight and going to bed she sat beside him. When he didn't respond she took her chance to study him._

_He looked almost harmless here on the couch with his eyes closed and without his gourd. He looked almost normal, except for his eyes and his tattoo. She stopped herself before she reached out to see if she could smudge the black lines around his eyes._

'_Are you insane?' she hissed at herself, 'He is not a teddy bear!'_

_Gaara was watching her. Before she could stop herself she blurted out, "What's it like, having a demon inside you?"_

"_I don't want to tell you."_

"_Ok." Sakura tried to smile, but she felt like everything was falling down on her and trying to suffocate her. 'Just because he said no? You're being a little melodramatic don't you think?' "Well I'm going to bed. Goodnight!" She tried her best to step lightly as she left the room._

_In her own room Sakura slid out of her clothes and in between her blankets. She stared at the dent in the wall where she had kicked it. Her stomach felt weird, as if there was a hand grabbing it from the inside._

"_Gah!" she snorted, unreasonably frustrated and pulled the covers over her head. She used to love being under her blankets, in the dark, in the safety. But it no longer felt safe, not like it used to. Everything had changed in one night._

"_But everything has to get better at some point." She whispered to herself._

When Naruto and Sasuke left again, about a week later, Gaara could feel a change in Sakura. He didn't understand the change, but there it was all the same.

He sat in the shop and pondered this. In truth, he thought about pondering the subject then laughed at himself and started rearranging the shop. It really was inconveniently arranged for moving about. He could feel boredom creeping back, and with it, the demon.

The days passed with the same routine, but somehow it had taken two weeks for it to start becoming unbearable. Normally Gaara would have been sick of it within days.

Later that night they sat in the living room. Sakura looked up from her book to say, "We should do something."

Gaara watched her carefully, wondering if he really wanted to do 'something'.

"If only there was something happening… We could just visit Ino!"

Gaara made a face, "But what if she's…"

"What?"

Gaara realized what he was thinking was inappropriate and decided against finishing his thought. "Nothing." This was why he avoided conversation.

Sakura got up to get her jacket, thankfully ignoring his comments. The weather had gotten much cooler in the past weeks. Gaara himself was almost tempted to wear a jacket. _**(but can you imagine Gaara in a jacket?)**_

They walked out into the evening. Sakura sighed happily beside him. She had vocalized before how much she loved the night air, especially in Konoha. She seemed to think it was somehow different from the air during the day. It was just colder.

Unsurprisingly, Ino was not alone when they got there. Mark was sitting on the couch behind her when she opened the door. Fortunately they were both fully dressed.

"Hey babes!" Ino greeted them, mostly Sakura. Gaara could tell she was still afraid of him, as she should be. If she ever called him babe he wouldn't hesitate in crushing her throat. Gaara tried not to laugh as Ino offered them food as they took their seats.

"No thanks, we just ate." Sakura said for them. Gaara was content to let her talk for him. It saved him from wasting his breath on her stupid friends. They sat for a while, Ino and Sakura talking, then Ino asked Sakura to follow her to her bedroom. "I want to show you something."

Sakura glanced quickly at Gaara, but he pretended not to notice or care. She got up and left with Ino. Mark watched them go (Gaara followed his line of vision and saw he was watching their butts) then turned to Gaara with a snort. "Women eh?"

Gaara was careful not to look at him. He knew that if he did look at the idiot he would end up killing him. This was the real reason he avoided conversation. 'Just don't let him talk to me,' he asked whatever force was out there that might still listen to his request, 'Don't let Sakura be long.'

"_What do you think you're doing?" Ino turned and asked Sakura as soon as the door was closed._

"_Um, I think-" Sakura started but Ino covered her mouth and pulled her into the corner._

"_Keep your voice down! He'll hear you." She pulled Sakura down into a crouch and whispered conspiratorially, "And by 'he' I do not mean Mark."_

"_You're talking about Gaara, yes?"_

"_Yes. In both instances." She stopped for a long moment and watched Sakura's confused face with one eyebrow raised, "Do you like him?"_

"_Well, yes." Sakura grabbed Ino's arm before she could say anything, "But not in the way I know you're thinking!" she floundered in silence for a moment, struggling to find words to explain how she felt about Gaara. In the end, she failed, "It's a long story." She said lamely._

_Ino put her fists under her chin and grinned at Sakura, "I've got time to listen, if you think Mark if safe enough out there with him," they both looked at the door leading to the room the men were sitting in. Ino looked back at Sakura and shrugged. "You know, I've got time anyway. This is kind of fun, don't you think? Whispering in the corner."_

_Sakura rolled her eyes "Sure brings back memories."_

_Ino poked her, "Come on. I know you want to tell me."_

"_Oh yes, your persuasive powers are too much for me to resist." Sakura said sarcastically. Ino smiled and wiggled her fingers at her. "Fine. You know two years ago when I was kidnapped? Well… he was there and he saved me, as much as he could without being a hero anyway." She tried a smile, but it felt rather pathetic._

_Ino was silent. Finally she made a face. "That's it? You said it was a long story! There aren't any juicy details you're leaving out?"_

"_Sure I left out details, but no 'juicy' ones that you would appreciate," Sakura poked Ino's forehead as she said so, "We walked through the desert for maybe a week, during which I was pretty out of it and then I came home alone. Oh, and then he bought a bracelet from me, but that was some months ago only."_

_Ino sighed and hugged Sakura, "All right then. And you're over Sasuke?"_

"_Oh yes." Sakura nodded against Ino's chest._

_Ino sighed deeply. Sakura could feel it against her cheek and she felt calmed by it. "I miss the days when you would talk to me about your crushes." Ino said._

"_Might I remind you that the last time that happened we stopped being friends?"_

_Ino snorted, "You know what I mean."_

_Sakura smiled, "When I have a new one, you'll be the first to know."_

Gaara looked up relieved when Ino and Sakura returned. He had been forced to retreat into a meditative state when Mark decided he wanted to talk.

"Mark!" ... But Mark talked too much, so Gaara had given up meditating finally and just tied and gagged him. Ino ran over to untie him as Sakura turned to face the wall. Gaara stood and went to the door. He couldn't understand why Sakura liked these people.

Sakura quickly said goodbye and joined him outside. She wouldn't look at him as they walked away. She was shaking, was it because of him? Well, he wasn't about to apologize if she was mad at him for tying up Ino's idiot boy.

Sakura burst out laughing suddenly. Gaara stopped walking he was so shocked. She was… laughing? Laughing at him. He didn't understand her at all.

"I know I should be angry," She said through her laughter, "But that was just so…" She bent over, wheezing with laughter. Gaara couldn't remember ever hearing anyone laugh so much over anything other than death.

Sakura stood suddenly and straightened her clothing. "Ok, never mind that!" she said and pointed in the direction of her apartment. "To the apartment!"

Gaara shook his head; what a ridiculous being. No doubt it was that which kept him from boredom with her. Her turned and followed Sakura, who was now skipping away.

'_Just one more week.' Sakura thought as she washed dishes and put them on the drying rack. When she had finished she joined Gaara on the couch. "What do you do all the time?" she asked._

_Gaara looked up from his fingers, "Breathe."_

"_I mean, how do you keep yourself occupied? You must get so bored, being awake all the time…" She imagined it for a moment, "But you've seen everything."_

"_Hm?"_

"_You've seen all your life, unlike the rest of us. We miss so much of our life-"_

"_Stop it." He said coldly. Sakura stopped, feeling stupid. Of course, he wouldn't enjoy being awake all the time, he could never sleep to keep a vicious demon at bay. And here she was talking about it as though it was a kind of blessing._

_She sat back in the couch, and changed the subject. "So… what will you do when you leave?"_

Gaara watched Sakura out of the corner of his eye. Was she hinting that he should leave? He had stayed for a while. She must be getting sick of him. Her and the rest of the world.

He shrugged, trying to pretend he didn't care. And he didn't. Not one bit. "Go back to the desert. I miss it sometimes."

He could see Sakura shudder at the thought of the desert. 'Well of course she would hate it.'

"Maybe I'll come visit you sometime." She said quietly.

Gaara shrugged, "If you can find me."

_Sakura yawned and scratched her belly as she walked into the kitchen, "Morning Gaara." As usual he didn't answer. She picked a fruit and bit into it, revived by the tart juice. She looked around the corner to ask Gaara how hungry he was._

"_Are you going to have… breakfast…" The living room was empty._

"_Ok. No need to panic, he probably just went out for a walk…" 'Who are you kidding? He never goes out for walks. Start panicking now! Scream! Smash things!'_

_Sakura sighed and shut up her inner voice. Sometimes it was like having her own demon inside._

_Breathing deeply, she searched the room to find all of Gaara's things were gone. She went out onto the roof to look for anything, but there was nothing to be seen. In her search for a head of red hair, she failed to notice the black and blonde heads making their way towards her._

_Sakura went back inside and flopped down on the couch. "He's gone…" She stood suddenly and kicked a chair into the wall. "Shit!"_

_She sank back onto the couch. When Kakashi had convinced her she needed the money she would have gotten from him, he had been right, and now she had failed. 'No money for me. I couldn't even keep him here for a month. Why is it that I always end up alone again?'_

"_That's it! I'm getting a cat!" Sakura stood determined and marched to the door, yanking it open angrily. There stood Naruto and Sasuke. Naruto had his hand up as though he was about to knock._

"_Hey Sakura…" he said, almost nervously. "Just stopping by to say hi, we're back."_

"_Hi." Sasuke mumbled._

_Sakura blinked. For some reason her brain took a long while to process the fact that they were standing there. Finally she stepped back to let them in, "Want some breakfast? I was just about to eat."_


	11. Sixth Encounter

Sixth Encounter

_Sakura rubbed her temple, extremely irritated with herself. Why the hell had she come back to this godforsaken desert? What more could she get from it now, except another sunburn? 'It's curiosity,' she told herself for the umpteenth time that day. 'I'm just curious about what happened to Gaara. And I said I might visit him sometime.'_

_So she had come out to a place she absolutely hated to find a man she had maybe known for three months total. How pathetic. He would laugh at her if he was here now._

_Of course, if he was with her now, she wouldn't be in the desert. And if he had just stayed with her, this situation wouldn't be happening at all. Because she had another reason for coming to see Gaara, one that was more important._

_After days of searching she had finally found the hidden Sand village. Now she would just go see Temari, ask where Gaara was and be on her way back home._

'_It's not home,' A voice laughed at her and she told it to shut up. Finally she found the building she had been looking for and knocked on the door. She waited for a while before Temari answered._

_Temari had grown, Sakura noticed, and in all the best ways, "Hi Temari," Sakura greeted her timidly._

"_Hi…" Temari looked a little suspicious and Sakura tried to relieve any suspicions she might have right away._

"_I just wanted to ask, um… where's Gaara?"_

_Temari shrugged, but Sakura was sure she watched her more closely. "I don't know. We haven't seen him for years now. If you do see him, will you tell him come see me?"_

_Sakura nodded solemnly. She really didn't know anything about the siblings' feelings towards each other, but she hadn't thought Temari would worry about Gaara. It must have been hard having him as a brother. She had hoped, though, that if she didn't care about Gaara she would at least know where he was. So much for that idea. "Well, thank you anyway Temari. I should get going."_

"_Wait Sakura." Temari looked around to see if anyone was listening. There were people on the street nearby, but she spoke anyway. "Do you need a place to stay for the night? You can stay with me."_

"_I don't want to get in your way…" Sakura said, secretly hoping Temari wouldn't change her mind._

"_Oh come on, no need to be so falsely polite." Temari held open the door and snorted, "Besides, it's not like I have anyone else to get in my way."_

_Sakura stepped inside, removing her hat and sandals as she said, "No boyfriend then?"_

_Temari laughed, "Gods no!"_

_Sakura grinned with her, "Good. It's so awkward with Ino sometimes."_

_Temari showed her down the hallway to the guest room. "You can stay for as long as you want. Make this placea sort of base of operations." She stopped in the doorway, "It won't be easy to find him you know. He's never… Ah, forget it."_

_Sakura smiled at the room and Temari as she walked in, "I haven't had an easy time so far."_

_Temari nodded, "Yes well, I'm sure you'll be wanting to clean up. Are you hungry?"_

"_I'll be fine eating whenever you do. I'll clean up so I don't stink too much."_

"_Ok." Temari left and Sakura dumped her pack on the floor. How different the siblings were. She stepped into the bathroom, smiling at the lovely bath in there. Temari had a very nice place._

_She peeled off her shirt, throwing the sweat soaked garment aside. She should wash her clothes later. For now she would wash herself. Even though she loved baths Sakura tried to use as little water as possible, knowing it's value out here._

_Too soon she was clean and dressing to go talk to Temari again. She liked the idea of having a place to come back to out in the desert while she was there; and Temari was a strangely comforting person. She and her brother had that in common at least. Sakura kind of wished she could have been part of their family._

_She found Temari in the front hall talking with a man dressed in black. Sakura was sure to make her feet slap loudly on the floor as she approached so they wouldn't think she was spying._

_The man in black looked up first, but it was Temari who spoke, "Sakura, may I presentthe Kazekage."_

_Sakura bowed to the man, inspecting him as she did so. So this was the man who had taken Gaara's place. For such a role he didn't seem very threatening, or impressive. He looked just like a normal person actually. Then again, sanity was probably a good quality for the Kazekage to have and it was not a quality apparent in Gaara._

"_Good day, Kazekage." Sakura greeted him respectfully._

"_Good day Sakura." He bowed his head slightly, a courtesy Sakura knew she didn't really deserve, but she was glad to receive it. He turned to Temari then and said, "If you'll excuse me, I have very important matters to attend to." He rolled his eyes and left through the door._

"_Not too dramatic I see." Sakura commented about him once he had left._

_Temari watched the door and nodded, "He's very practical…" She turned and smiled at Sakura, "You sure clean up nicely, don't you?"_

_The next morning Sakura was off again, after thanking Temari for her hospitality and her offer of future hospitality._

'_Now if I was Gaara, where would I be?' Sakura thought, but as hard as she tried she just couldn't imagine being Gaara. 'If I had to be him, I'd bury myself in forty feet of sand.' She seriously hoped he had not done so, as she would never find him if he had._

_She decided she would try to find the desert people and then she would… She had no idea what she would do. She didn't know what she would do if she ever found Gaara. One thing was certain, she would warn him._

_It took two days of wandering to find the desert people. Sakura hadn't actually expected to find them so easily, but she had stumbled upon an oasis and there they were._

_A small child saw her first and yelled to the others while pointing at her. Sakura felt fear clawing its way through her insides, but she forced it back. These were people, normal people. This was just like a village, albeit a moving village. A group of women came forward and brought her to the water, making sure she drank her fill before anyone bothered her._

_When she had finished they sat her in the shade of a giant burden beast and told her to wait and someone would be with her. She felt like she was in a waiting room, waiting to see someone important._

_She didn't have to wait long before an old couple followed by a young man came to talk to her. They were all dark, the colour of tea, and dressed brightly. The old man knelt on her left and the old woman on her right as the other man sat in front of her._

"_Good day." Sakura bowed from the waist._

_The man did the same and greeted her as well. Sakura grabbed her arms away as the old couple started to inspect her._

"_I'm fine!" she said, "I'm not injured, but thank you."_

_The man nodded and sat back, but the old woman grinned at Sakura, "I understand you don't want to speak of it in front of the men, but I would hardly call you uninjured. Why don't you come talk with me later tonight, eh dear?"_

_Sakura nodded and turned back to the young man as he spoke, "I am Argan, the leader of my people, for now. What may we call you?"_

"_I'm Sakura." She waited nervously before continuing. Argan said nothing, just watched her, reminding her of another man she knew. "I was wondering if you could help me. I'm looking for a man… His name is Gaara, he's short, he has red hair and he um, he controls sand. He's always got that big gourd on his back."_

_Argan nodded, "We know of the one you describe, but we have not seen him for many months." Sakura's spirits dropped into the pit of her stomach with a dull thud. Another dead end. "But a strange storm began and has not stopped or moved from the ruins of the village Kartheid. Maybe there is a connection."_

_Sakura nodded hopefully, "I think there is!" She jumped up and grabbed her bag, "Thank you so much!"_

"_You're not leaving so soon little one?" the old woman spoke, "You should stay for the night in comfort with us. It is many days to your destination."_

_Sakura gave in, decided to wait until the next morning to continue on. She was almost certain that if she got to the heart of that storm she would find Gaara. And if he had been there for months he wouldn't leave soon. But as she sat with the desert men and shared their food she couldn't help but worry about him. What if someone else found him first? What was he doing? Was he…_

"_Some wounds never heal child." The old woman said quietly, "But all things get better." Sakura jumped; she hadn't noticed the old woman approach. What was wrong with her? Even so distracted she should still have noticed her. The old woman sat beside Sakura; she was surprisingly nimble for her age. "You must get on with your life."_

_Sakura didn't like the way this woman was lecturing her as if she knew all about her life. And it was creepy that she had said those exact words… "I've already had this conversation, and I've already moved on with my life."_

_The old woman smiled condescendingly, "Then why are you back here?"_

"_I'm looking for a friend."_

"_A friend?"_

"_Yes, a friend!" Sakura felt like yelling at the old woman, but she refrained. "I have friends! I have work; I have moved on!"_

_The old woman frowned, "How can you say that when you won't let anyone get close to you?"_

_Sakura clamped her jaw shut then. If there was one useful thing she had learned from Gaara it was that silence was the best way to get rid of people. She waited for the woman to leave and went to sleep._

_When she woke up the next morning the burden beasts had all been loaded down and the people were ready to go. Argan met her as she was leaving. "Your destination is several days walk in that direction. I would go with you to show you the way, but I must follow my people, and we aren't going your way."_

"_Thanks Argan," Sakura bowed to him and waved goodbye and she set out, "Maybe we'll meet again someday!"_

_She set out with high spirits, but after four days of walking over endless sands she was feeling pretty low, and her water supply matched her mood. At the end of the fourth day though, she had reached the village._

'_Wow, he must be upset,' Sakura thought, faced with the sheer enormity of the sandstorm. She was sure it was Gaara causing the storm. 'So now what genius? You can't get through there; he'd kill you.'_

"_Gaara!" she yelled, at a loss for what to do. "Gaara, it's Sakura. Please let me in!"_

_Nothing._

_Sakura sat at the edge of the storm. Today she would use that great brain of hers. If it was all she really had she had best make use of it._

_But her mind was completely blank. 'Not now, not now please.' No inspiration came to her. Finally she decided she had two choices. One: she could try to get through the storm, but that would depend on Gaara being unwilling to kill her. Idly, she stuck a hand into the storm, pulling it out quickly before it was ripped to shreds. She held her injured hand and glared at the storm, 'Okay, so first choice is out.'_

_Second choice then: she could try to get over the storm and drop into the heart. She couldn't just jump it though, if only there was some sort of giant bird… Sakura laughed out loud at her thoughts. 'Oh sure, a giant bird is just going to fly overhead…"_

_She looked up as a shadow covered her, 'No way!' But it wasn't a bird. It was a wave of sand, reaching out to engulf her. Sakura didn't even bother screaming as it lifted her through the air and into the calm heart of the sandstorm. She was still held immobile as she was held inches away from the creator of the storm._

_She was struck by how empty his eyes looked. Maybe she just hadn't noticed it before, but his face now was so lifeless she felt like crying,except she didn't do that anymore._

"_Gaara," she croaked, "Please put me down, you're crushing my ribs."_

_He blinked and she noticed how much the dark lines around his eyes seemed to have grown. "You…" he said quietly and set her down. His eyes regained some life and they focused on her. "What do you think you're doing?"_

"_I 'think' I came to warn you. I came because…" she was having a hard time catching her breath again after having it all squeezed out of her. She breathed deeply, watching Gaara's face, surprised at how much she had missed him, "I came to warn you. Someone has been killing ninjas… important people and because the bodies are all so mangled and crushed everyone thinks it's you." She stopped and watched his expression closely, "It wasn't you right?"_


	12. Part 2

Gaara watched the woman in front of him, hardly comprehending that she was actually there, and now she was demanding answers from him. He shook his head.

"Oh good!" Sakura sat back and observed him, "But they still suspect you of course. Well actually, they're all convinced it's you and they want you dead."

Gaara snorted, "Doesn't everyone."

Sakura shook her head. He wasn't sure if she was shaking her head because it was the truth or because she was disagreeing with him.

"I know you can take care of yourself, but…" here she grinned at him, "You meditate too deeply. And they're going to send jounin after you and… well I just thought you should know."

Gaara glared at her, "What's it to you?"

Sakura's eyes grew wide and she leaned back. She started picking at her clothing as she did when she was nervous, or had something to hide. "I just wanted to be sure you knew, so you can prepare in case they find you and they will. I mean, the sandstorm isn't exactly the best hiding place for you."

Gaara realized he was keeping the sandstorm going and let it drop. The sudden silence made him feel he had gone deaf. "I don't need to hide."

Sakura's shoulders drooped forward a little and her hair dropped over her eyes. She should really cut it again. "I know that…" she said, "I just… I worry about you." She spoke so quietly he wondered if he had imagined it, then she looked up and spoke louder, "And it's not like there's just going to be a few jounin after you. They know you're strong and they want you dead. And there's probably a price on your head by now."

Gaara almost believed her when she said she was only here to warn him, but he knew better from years of hate from others. She couldn't be telling him everything. He decided to be nice to her anyway, "Alright. Do you want me to walk you home?" he asked, hoping she would say yes, even if it was all just a plot to get him to go back with her. He didn't really care what she wanted anyway; life was just too boring to spend it this way.

Sakura nodded, "But you can't come all the way with me," She bit her lip. Not a plot then. She looked around at the sand now entirely covering the village, "Why do we always end up back here?"

"It has sentimental value," Gaara offered sarcastically.

Sakura laughed, "Do you know that I actually miss living with you? It took me eight months to come to terms with it and I still don't understand why."

'Eight months? It's been eight months?' Gaara thought. What had he been doing in all that time? Sitting here? Well at least he hadn't been bored.

"You could walk me part of the way home, if it's not too much trouble." Sakura said, turning to face him.

"I'm the one who offered in the first place," Gaara pointed out, "No need to be so polite."

_They stopped to camp just at the border of the desert. This was where they would part ways once again. But tonight they would spend together._

_Sakura stopped Gaara before he could go into a meditative state. "I'm sure you've had enough of that to last you a few years by now." She said, "Why don't you join the living tonight? Or one of them, a rather pathetic and half alive excuse for one."_

"G_ood!" she said when Gaara sat back and did not attempt to get away. She wondered why he meditated so often anyway. "So what was it like? All those months?"_

"_Nothing."_

"_Nothing?" she echoed, a bit disappointed, "Weren't you even hungry?"_

_He shook his head, "I'm not much like you." He really had become quite sarcastic._

"_So where will you go?"_

"_I shouldn't tell you that. You'll give me away."_

_If he had been anyone else (mostly just Naruto) she would have given him the smack down right then, but she was still a little afraid of him, though she hated to admit it. "Fine. I'll just change the subject again, but I can't keep this up all night."_

"_I can." Gaara said, and Sakura almost wished he would have winked. 'But that would just be creepy.'_

"_So, have you heard about the new Kazekage?" she asked, hoping he would actually talk about this._

"_He can't be that new, considering how long I've been gone."_

"_Well, ok, but have you met him?"_

"_No."_

_Sakura leaned back on her elbows, "He seems a pleasant enough fellow. I think he'll do a good job, so does Temari I think."_

"_You saw Temari?" It was too bad he spoke with such indifference or Sakura would have thought he actually cared for his sister. Instead it seemed he asked more for Sakura's sake than out of any genuine interest._

"_I stayed with her for a night. She wants to see you."_

_Gaara snorted, "You don't know my family."_

"_Fine." Sakura shrugged, knowing it was useless to push him. They sat in silence; Sakura knew that if she didn't speak he wouldn't either and the silence was comfortable._

"_If they come after you, please don't kill them." She said suddenly, quietly. She almost felt bad for breaking the silence._

"_You said yourself they want to kill me."_

_Why did he seem to feel the need to contradict and refuse all of her requests? "I know but it will help me." She was having a hard time putting her thoughts into words, "You have to prove them wrong as well as you can until we can really prove them wrong with evidence." Please._

What a fool. Sakura should know that if this 'they' she spoke of thought he was a murderer, they were right. Even though he hadn't killed those ninja, how many others had he killed? He had lived all his life knowing that everyone wanted him dead. Knowing how much easier it would be for everyone if he would just give up and die.

He agreed to her plea anyway. He was rather disgusted with how weak he had become with the woman, but so it was. "Fine."

She lay back, apparently satisfied. Soon she was asleep, leaving him in the waking world.

'No point in staying here.'

_When Sakura woke up she was alone. 'Figures,' she though bitterly and went on her way._

_She arrived in the village a few days later in the late afternoon. Before going back to her apartment she stopped at Ino's place, but she wasn't home. She was feeling low as she walked home, and, of course, it started to rain. She lifted her face to the sky and opened her mouth to let the rain fall in._

_Sasuke and Naruto were out as well she noticed as she unlocked her door. Sighing, she opened the door and made her way to the bedroom. 'A nap would be nice' she thought, but she never made it to her bed._

Gaara sat on the roof and watched Temari's door. Sakura seemed to think Temari wanted to see him, but it was just so unlike his family…

He burst into a cloud of sand as the door opened and Temari came out with a man dressed in black; the Kazekage. He watched as the man walked away and Temari turned to look up at the place where he had been sitting moments ago. She looked so strange… old.

Gaara let himself drift away. It was useless. He might as well not hide. He should just do whatever he wanted, and right now he wanted to find Sakura and tell her not to bother. He wasn't worth the trouble she had said she would go through for him.

It didn't take him long to reach the village. He traveled so much faster without her there to slow him down.

Before he entered he could tell something was wrong. He went in to her apartment through the window. No one was there and her apartment was a mess. Sakura didn't like her space to be messy. So where was she?

He jumped out onto the roof, checking everywhere, but she wasn't in the village anymore.

He stopped running when a shuriken glanced off his back. He turned to see Sasuke jumping at him.

"What did you do to Sakura?" he demanded as his hands formed shapes in the air.

Gaara wrapped him in sand before he could do anything. "Where is she?"

Sasuke glared at Gaara, but Gaara knew he was better at it. How he would love to kill Sasuke right then and there, but he had promised Sakura he wouldn't.

"I don't believe you!" Gaara dodged four more shuriken as Naruto joined them, "If we find her body too, all crushed like the others I will kill you!"

'Why wait, when you're so determined to kill me now?' Gaara thought angrily. 'Why am I so plagued by my promises to her?' And why should he waste time with these two idiots when he could be out finding her?

Gaara squeezed the air from Sasuke until he passed out and raised a sandstorm around himself before leaving. He had more important things to do.

* * *

**Many thanks to any and every one who has reviewed. You're all lovely chickies.**

**KageAi and DrkMooNGrl: I'll try my best to update as often as possible **


	13. Part 3

_When Sakura woke up she had one of the worst headaches of her life. 'Definitely among the top three…' she thought disgustedly and got up to get some tea. Or rathershe tried to. She realized her hands were chained behind her back and looked around at her surroundings. She was in a forest with four, five…six men, and one woman, all well armed._

_The woman walked up and nudged Sakura with her foot, despite her attempts to appear unconscious still. "Hey you, just who's side are you on?"_

_Sakura remained silent._

_The woman knelt in front of her, "We're on your side. We're going to getthe bastard for what he did. Those were good people he killed." Sakura looked at the woman's face. She looked like any normal person, not hostile at all. Sakura felt so sad, realizing that these were the people she had so looked up to, the people at whose side she used to fight, would have. And she knew they were good people who had died, but Gaara didn't do it. She was getting sick of people blaming him for everything._

'_Leave me alone. Please leave me alone, before I try to kill you again,' Sakura willed the woman._

"_You had better be good bait," a man spoke up, "I don't think Auris' face will ever be the same again. Not that it was pretty in the first place."_

_Sakura looked over to a bloody faced man, 'Ha.' She thought smugly._

"_Bait?" she asked mock innocently._

"_Don't act like you don't know. I'm sure even you could figure out why you're here."_

_Yes, she could figure it out. They thought Gaara would come for her. She tried not to laugh. He was far away now, in the desert and he would stay there until she went to him. They were wasting their time with her._

'_So, what to do now? Gaara isn't coming, so you'll have to get yourself out of this mess.' She already knew she wasn't much of a match for these seven, even if she wasn't caught by surprise, as she had been that night. She was going to have to think her way out of this._

_First, she wanted to know more about these people, so she sat back and waited._

Her smell was everywhere. She was bleeding after all. The scent as good as pointed the way for Gaara. Obviously whoever had taken her didn't know how to hide, or they didn't want to.

Gaara spread out into sand particles as her scent grew stronger. He could count six people around her; she herself was tied up.

He dropped the man standing furthest away before drifting into the camp. "I expect better from you." He whispered into Sakura's ear before materializing and grabbing the men nearest her by the throat.

One of them disappeared from his grip and reappeared inches away, but Gaara was prepared for such a move and lashed out at him, knocking him back into a tree. He spread his body out as the remaining three aimed shuriken at his heart.

He dropped the man he held in his grip as he passed out from lack of oxygen and jumped into the trees, pulling his sand back into his gourd.

The last three smiled, thinking they had him trapped. He was about to grab them when Sakura yelled at him, apparently finally rising out of her surprise.

"What are you doing? Untie me already!" she yelled hoarsely.

Gaara rolled his eyes and allowed himself a small smirk. She was still the same, even when held as a hostage. His smirk worried the men standing around him, so he smiled even wider.

Sakura sat still as her chains were unlocked from the inside and Gaara jumped down to meet his attackers.

_Seeing that they were all occupied Sakura crawled over to a fallen man and checked his pulse. He was still alive, she saw with relief. She had been a little worried when she saw the crazed expression on Gaara's face, but he had actually listened to her._

_She counted the men, one, two , three, and Gaara was fighting three, so where was the woman? Sakura looked around, but she couldn't see her anywhere, so she closed her eyes and concentrated._

_The quietest rustle in the leaves above the fight alerted Sakura to the woman's position. Sakura had no time to be proud of herself for hearing her, and having no weapons, she launched herself at the woman._

_She obviously had not been expecting an attack from her bait as she fell right out of the tree with Sakura on top. Sakura realized why she hadn't seen the woman before; she was invisible._

_She may not have been able to see her but she could still feel the woman. Sakura quickly landed a punch on her nose and felt it break before she was thrown back. Sakura flipped as she flew through the air so instead of crashing into the tree behind her she landed neatly on it._

_She closed her eyes, "You might as well drop the invisibility spell, you're just wasting your chakra." She taunted the woman, hoping she would take the bait and Sakura would be able to fight with her eyes open._

_The womansaid nothing, tried to sneak up on Sakura, butSakura let herself fall forward and around the tree to hit her from behind._

"_You could never sneak up on me," Sakura laughed, "You breathe as loudly as a pig."_

_She heard a light thump as the woman landed on the tree across from her. Sakura was about to follow when she heard the woman's strangled scream._

_She opened her eyes to see Gaara's sand wrapped around an invisible body. Gaara stood down the ground, watching it with that insane grin._

_Sakura jumped down to stand beside him, "You didn't kill them," she said offhandedly, pretending it meant nothing._

_Gaara let the woman drop to the ground with a much more audible thump. He had stopped smiling, "No I didn't."_

"_Seems you fell right into their trap," Sakura looked around with her fingers to her lips, realizing she was smiling slightly. She really shouldn't have been considering who these people were, but she kept thinking, 'I hope you wake up with a headache.'_

"_Your friends were worried." Gaara said._

_Sakura nodded. 'Of course, my friends. Not you.' She laughed a little at herself, 'You think Gaara was worried about you? Ha!' but a small part of her asked, 'If he didn't care, then why did he come for you? He's not afraid of Naruto.'_

"And angry." Gaara added, remembering their pitiful attacks. These seven were pitiful as well, to think they could get rid of him so easily.

"I don't think I can just go back home," Sakura said, scratching her head, "I'll just be taken as bait again."

"You could live with your friend." Gaara suggested. Then at least it would be their fault if she went missing again and they wouldn't be able to blame him. 'Of course, they would anyway.'

Sakura nodded, "That's actually a good idea."

'What, you think I never have good ideas?' Gaara thought, though completely unaffected by her comment. Sakura smirked."I'll go back with you."

"Ok."

They weren't really very far away from Konoha village. It might have taken a day to walk back, but Sakura wanted to run anyway.

"I missed my daily run." She said and they ran back within the afternoon.

Gaara left her at the gate, but he followed her secretly as she went to Sasuke and Naruto's apartment. Naruto tackled her as soon as he saw her but Sasuke held back. 'Strange,' Gaara thought, 'He wasn't so reserved about his concern with me.'

He shrugged and left then. He had more important things to do.

'Running away again?' a voice said in his head, and it was not his own, nor was it the demon.

He turned to see Ino grinning smugly at him from her perch on a roof. How he wanted to knock that grin off her face, and her into the dust.

"Hey, I'm just trying to give you some friendly advice!" Ino exclaimed, "But if you don't want it…"

"I don't." Gaara said, completely uninterested and turned to leave.

"Hey wait!" Ino called, "You like her, don't you?"

'I don't like you.' He thought.

'Well if that's how you want to be,' she sent back, 'then you don't deserve her anyway. Sakura needs someone better than you.'

'Sakura doesn't need anyone!' he thought angrily and forced her out of his head. If Sakura hadn't already told Ino what had happened three years ago then he wouldn't be the one to tell her. So he left.

"_You can sleep in my room!" Naruto said, bouncing up and down._

"_Do you really want to subject her to that?" Sasuke asked, "Your room is disgusting."_

'_If it's anything like their apartment…' Sakura thought. Their apartment was a mess. She had never really been over here before, so she hadn't known. If she had known she would have gone to stay with Ino. 'But that would be gross, with her and Mark…' she cut off her thought and forced a smile for Sasuke, who offered her his room._

"_It's a lot cleaner."_

"_That would be great!" she said cheerily and followed him to his room. "I don't mean to be a burden…" 'I never mean to, but I always am. What's the point in talking about it?'_

"_It's no trouble." Sasuke said and patted her shoulder awkwardly._

_Sakura dumped her bag in the corner of his room. It really was cleaner. It was bare actually. Nothing more than a bed and a dresser that was probably empty._

'_Does he even sleep in here?' she wondered. 'Of course. Everyone needs to sleep sometime. Well, except Gaara, but he's an exception in everything.'_

"_Thank you guys so much." She said later as they were eating dinner at the ramen stand._

"_Like I said…" Sasuke started but he was interrupted by Naruto._

"_Are you kidding? This is great! The three of us, just like old times. I'll be kind of disappointed when Gaara is caught and you go back home."_

'_Such tact.' Sakura thought and stuffed her mouth to cover her smile and her anger._

_Tomorrow she would go visit Tsunade and ask about possible suspects. Anyone who could have killed those men and who would want Gaara framed for it._

Gaara raced through the desert, chasing down his prey.

He knew who the murderer was. He would catch him and bring him to Sakura and she would get him locked away, or whatever they wanted to do with him. Then they could forget about the whole thing and he could get back to his life. And she could go back to hers.

'On her own,' the demon taunted him, 'You don't want her living with those two idiots. But you know… it would be so much easier to just kill them and take her.'

'Go away.'

'What do you want with her anyway? Do you want to-' Gaara closed his mind to the demon before it could continue. He didn't want anything from her, except the end of this murderer issue. He just wanted to be left alone.

_Sakura had narrowed it down to six men. 'Six men that I know of. It could really be anyone; someone I've never even heard of before.' Before she could get any more depressed about the hopelessness of her task she concentrated on the necklace she was making._

_She was only now getting around to making something with the charms leftover from the bracelet Gaara had smashed. This necklace was one of those things. She had also made a pair of earrings. She wanted to give them to Temari, as thanks for her hospitality. Gaara had told her Temari liked jewelry._

_But she was afraid that if Gaara saw these he would recognize the scarlet birds and be angry. She reassured herself, thinking he would never remember them, and put the earrings in her office for later._

"_Four years ago, I would never have believed you'd end up doing this," Sasuke said, breaking the long silence that had fallen between them. He and Naruto had insisted on at least one them being with her at all times, just in case. Sakura had at first been annoyed, but now she was glad for the company, if not for the protection and small feeling she got._

'_As if I were still a child,' Sakura snorted, both at herself and Sasuke's comment._

"_I guess that came out differently then I wanted." Sasuke went on, "I meant, this is good, it's just not what we had always planned."_

"_If things had gone as I planned years ago…" Sakura said. 'If things had gone as planned, we'd be together and I would be a mother. If things had gone as planned, I would be a completely different person, and so would you.'_

"_Yeah, I guess sometimes it's better that our plans fail." Sasuke said, guessing at her thoughts. "We wouldn't be here now."_

"_Your plans sure were different." Sakura commented lightly. She enjoyed talking with Sasuke, and tried to encourage him to talk more._

"_Yes…" he fell silent. It seemed that was the wrong thing to say._

_Sakura held up the finished piece, "There! What do you think?"_

"_Beautiful."_

_She smiled and put it in the box with the earrings. When she went to give them to Temari she would find Gaara too and give him her list of suspects. Hopefully between the two of them they could narrow it down to one man._

_She paused. She would have to bring Narutoor Sasuke along too. Or maybe Ino…_

"_Hey Sasuke…" she said as she rejoined him at the front, "How would you feel about going on a little trip?"_

"_Where to?"_

"_The Hidden Sand Village."_

_His eyes narrowed, "Why?"_

_Sakura fidgeted a little. She hadn't told anyone where she had really gone when she went to find Gaara. She had told them she was visiting a relative. "Here's the thing. I didn't go visit my aunt."_

"_Was it Gaara?" Sasuke asked sharply. She looked up at him; his hands were clenched. _

"_Well, kind of. I went to find him and tell him about the murders."_

"_Sakura-"_

"_It wasn't him Sasuke!" she argued before he could say anything. "He was meditating the whole time! For eight months, actually," she stopped, wondering for the first time why he had gone into such a state. She quickly continued though, "Anyway, we're going to find the real killer."_

"_I-"_

"_But all that's beside the point. While I was looking for him I went to Temari and she was nice to me, so I made her these earrings and I want to give them to her."_

"_You could just get a messenger."_

_Sakura was kind of surprised at his reaction. She had expected, if not hoped for, flat out rejection. "Thank you Sasuke!" she squealed, hugging him in her relief. She quickly stepped away and he coughed, embarrassed._

"_We should leave pretty soon then."_

* * *

**Malitia: Thanks for your nice review. I hope to keep you all in suspense with many more twists and turns in the future plot. But I'll probably end up confusing everyone.**

**nishasha: I'm so happy that you called my story odd. It's probably among the top 5 compliments I've ever received on any of my writing. I love odd stories.**

**thaisha:Yar!**

**Doopy doop. I'm away!**


	14. Part 4

Gaara dragged the struggling man a few feet behind him. It hadn't taken long to get back to Konoha village, but the journey was not pleasant. It must have been even more unpleasant for the man, but Gaara couldn't care less.

As unobtrusively as possible Gaara dragged the man to Sakura's apartment, then remembered she was staying with her friends and dragged him there, careful to hit the mans head as often as possible. He checked through the window to make sure Sakura was there and found her asleep in one of the rooms. He didn't want to deal with her roommates, so he just went through the window.

She actually woke up before he woke her this time. Of course, seconds later Sasuke charged in looking ready to kill Gaara.

He ignored Sasuke, "I have the man." He said and pulled his murderer into the room.

"Sakura," Sasuke started, but she stopped him with a hand gesture.

"I'm fine Sasuke," she said. Gaara felt a strange satisfaction to see her silence him so, and also that they hadn't been sleeping in the same room. "You're sure this is him?" she asked Gaara.

He nodded and showed her the man's face. As soon as his head was uncovered the man started yelling and Gaara quickly covered his mouth again. "Recognize him?" he asked smugly and turned back to Sakura.

She had gone white and was reaching for a weapon. Sasuke saw this action as well and put a hand on her shoulder. "Maybe you should leave Gaara." He said.

"You shut up." Gaara told him.

"Stop it!" Sakura yelled, "That's not it Sasuke. This is the man who has really been murdering all those people. Now we're going to take him to Tsunade," she turned to Gaara, hesitated, "You should probably come too."

"Fine."

When they arrived Sakura did all the talking. Soon they were all in a room, all five of them, discussing the murders.

""I still don't see why you all think I would do something like that," the man, his name was Orphino, said. They hadn't gotten to his motive yet.

"Because you hate Gaara." Sakura replied.

"What? I've never even met him before!"

"Maybe not, but he's a well known man. You would have known who it was who killed your brother." He opened his mouth to protest, but she continued, "You would know all about Gaara's abilities and know that you're not strong enough to kill him on your own. But you wanted revenge, and you have no qualms about using and hurting others for your own purposes."

So she had figured it out. Gaara had expected she would recognize this man, and when he had seen her expression back at the apartment he was sure he was right. She really did have a quick mind, as everyone said.

Orphino laughed. He actually had the nerve to laugh. Gaara would have killed him then, but it would definitely not look good for them. 'Why did I ever leave the desert?'

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" Orphino asked Sakura.

Sakura looked about ready to kill Orphino too. "I know what kind of person you are and I will testify against you. Your brother deserved to die, and so do you!" she yelled, "Gaara did the world a favor when he killed that bastard and I'll be doing them a favor when I get you killed you disgusting little weakling."

Orphino laughed again, "You're calling me a weakling little girl? You know, I heard there was a pink haired ninja up here who had given up because she was too weak. That wouldn't happen to be you now would it?"

Sakura stood, but Sasuke took her hand and told her to sit back again. Gaara glared at the simple contact; it was more than he had ever been allowed with anyone, and that brat was using it to restrain her.

"Stop it." Tsunade said, putting up a hand. "Everyone just calm down. We'll discuss this further tomorrow, with a group ready to make this decision. For now Orphino and Gaara, I'll have to ask you to stay here, and Sakura and Sasuke can go home and return tomorrow if you want."

"I do." Sakura said.

"All right Sakura," Tsunade put a hand on the younger woman's shoulder, "I think that for now, you should get some sleep."

Gaara watched them leave, hating Sasuke for all he was worth. Hate was, after all, the most familiar feeling.

_Sakura asked Sasuke to wait while she went back to talk with Tsunade. She knocked softly on the doorframe before walking in._

"_Tsunade."_

"_Sakura? Sit down, just give me a second ok?"_

_Sakura nodded and waited a moment before speaking, "There's something I haven't told you, something I haven't told anyone and it's kind of important in this case." Tsunade nodded and she continued, "When I was kidnapped, those years ago… it was that man's brother who was the leader of that group. Orphino was one of his men."_

"_I see…"_

"_No, that's not it. I mean, that's not all," she was stalling and she knew it. Why was it so hard now? "He… They raped me."_

"_Sakura I-"_

"_Just wait! Please let me finish. He was there. He must have recognized me and even if he didn't I recognize him and then Gaara came and killed them all, but they weren't all there at the time. He must have left before and when he came back everything would have been gone. Gaara didn't know what the men did, but he must have known something was wrong and he did kill those men, but they deserved it. I don't know why I didn't think of him before.I might have seen doing something with earth, but… But I guess I just didn't want to think he could still be alive. I didn't want to remeber anything from that time.I just wanted it to be all over.Because if its all in the past then it can't affect me anymore right?I want…"_

"_Sakura please, you can stop now, I understand," Tsunade paused uncomfortably. This was why Sakura had wanted to go on, to avoid the silence, "I'm sorry too. I guess… I don't suppose you'll want it known to everyone?"_

"_If it means he will be brought to justice then yes. I give you this information to use as you see fit. Now I'm going to go get that sleep you suggested." Sakura stood and left to Tsunade's soft goodnight._

_She saw Gaara again on the way out. He was sitting on a bench, leaning his head back against the wall with his eyes closed. She really wanted to hug him then, but talked herself out of it._

"_Tomorrow Gaara," she said quietly. He didn't move, but she knew he heard her._

_She joined Sasuke outside and they walked back to the apartment in silence. Naruto was still asleep when they got back, and the sun was just peeking over the mountains._

"_Want some tea?" Sasuke asked, but she shook her head._

"_I'm just going to sleep…" she said, but instead of doing so she turned and hugged Sasuke as tightly as she could._

_They sat on the sofa as she held onto him for dear life. "I never wanted to die…" she whispered into his chest. He probably didn't hear her, but he held her tighter anyway._

Everyone in the room would have liked to kill him, and he knew it. He wouldn't mind killing them either, but he had promised Sakura.

'For someone who's trying to convince people he's not a murderer, you sure are a violent little bugger,' the demon mocked him.

'I'm not trying to convince them I'm not a murderer. We all know very well that would be a lie. I'm just trying to convince them I'm not this murderer.' Gaara replied, humoring the demon for once.

Sasuke and Sakura joined the party late. 'Slept in, ugly buggers.'

'Why do you insist on using that word so much now? It's not even a good word. And don't talk about her like that; she's the one who doesn't want to kill me, I think. Sasuke of course, you can bad mouth all you like.'

It was rather obvious the room was not leaning in his favor. No one really expected this unknown, this nobody to be the murderer, especially when they had the madman Gaara in their clutches.

'What would happen if I let them kill me?' he wondered, but the demon was silent. 'If you weren't inside me, I would rip you to pieces.'

Sakura stood suddenly, "Tsunade, have you told them everything?" she asked.

Everyone including Gaara looked to Tsunade. Gaara knew she hadn't told everything, but he also knew it was useless to come to his own defense. Good thing he had Sakura on his side. Now he wondered what else Sakura wanted everyone to know.

Tsunade shook her head. Sakura pointed dramatically at Orphino, 'Always with the drama, she is.' "That man and his brother raped me, and when Gaara killed his brother he wanted revenge."

'Oh perfect, now she's going to go and make me look like a good guy,' Gaara thought, but an old man asked Sakura why he had killed the brother and she couldn't tell him.

"Well, I'm not sure… He didn't know what they had done to me exactly…" Gaara couldn't help but smile. At least if he lost, he wouldn't lose his reputation as well. And he could tell by the way people were talking that they weren't much moved by her declaration.

"If he killed my brother I would want revenge too…" "But this proves nothing really," "Why would he kill others to get back at Gaara?" Then one man yelled, "Hey Sakura, what happened to your hand?"

"None of your business." She said.

"It was him wasn't it?" Another man said, glaring at Gaara.

Sakura frowned. She was cornered, poor woman, "It was an accident!"

"How do you know that? Did he tell you?" They all laughed. Gaara's word was worth nothing as far as they knew. They didn't know he never lied.

Sakura had given up being lost and now she was just angry, "Don't you get it? Did you not all hear whatI told you?That man is a monster!" she pointed to Orphino. "And he's still not strong enough to get Gaara!" Poor, silly woman was getting all worked up over this. 'Well, he did rape her… It's not like this is all for you.' Gaara snorted. The men looked at him, but hewatched Sakura and waited for her to continue.

"He needed to get you all to kill Gaara for him!" she went on, flailing her arms about in her agitation, "Besides, it couldn't have been Gaara; he was meditating in the desert all that time. Just ask the desert people. They'll tell you, a sandstorm sprang up and stayed in the same place, right after he left…me…" Sakura sat down suddenly, looking awfully confused and a little disturbed. Gaara watched her, wishing he could read her thoughts.

She looked up at him and her eyes were so sad. Gaara felt like the rest of the room just fell away as he looked in those eyes. He could feel them pulling him into her and her sadness, her depression, and he was ready to follow her.

But then she looked back at her hands folded in her lap and the feeling passed. Gaara felt so much lighter, so relieved to be free of her. Yet, he wanted to stand and go to her, but he couldn't really. And what would he do then? He couldn't touch her, couldn't help her in any way.

Except to get rid of this man, all that was left of that past. He turned his attention back to the room and he could tell that now they were divided, now they actually seemed to be favoring him.

"That's where she found me," he said. All eyes turned to look at him upon hearing him speak for the first time all day. All heads but one. It seemed she was done speaking for him, so he would speak for her. "She came to tell me to be careful because someone had framed me for these murders. I'm sure of you really looked at the bodies they wouldn't quite fit with the bodies of the people I kill." He smirked, "After all, there isn't much of a body left when I finish with them. I'm not going to lie; we all know I'm a killer, but not this time. If you don't get this man for these murders, and I'm sure I'd understand, after all, I know what you think of me," he glared at them, "But you had better make him pay for his other crimes, or I will kill him myself. And maybe even you."

Sakura looked up at him then. Her depression wasn't as obvious as before, "I'm sorry," she mouthed, but he didn't know why.

* * *

**The End.**

**Haha, but you'll all hate me for dragging this out. Too bad.**

**nishasha: I'd feel sorrier for my mind than for my fingers. winkwink And I never really thought about the six people Sakura would be thinking of.I'm not that responsible or thoughtfula writer.**

**Sakura Kage: I don't think anything will happen with Sasuke. I don't like him enough. But you never know... (I wish I had a beard to rub)**

**crazytreeotaku: ... **

**Malitia: Eheh, I'm sorry for confusing so much. There will be no more mystery murderers in the future I promise! But I won't promise less confusing-ness. That would end up being a lie.**

**Hao'sAnjul: Plotting is good. When I have one.**

**JohnnyG: Is so sophisticated. You make me feel like a big lame-o. Thanks!**


	15. Seventh Encounter

"_Okay Sasuke!" Sakura yelled, banging on the door, "Let's go already!"_

_He came out moments later with his pack and eyed her much smaller pack, "Sure you've got enough?"_

_Sakura rolled her eyes, "I've done this before."_

"_So I hear."_

_Sakura was glad he hadn't started acting all weird after he found out she was raped. The others had promised her not to tell anyone else, but they acted weirdly, not that she saw them often. She still hadn't told Naruto, and she probably never would because he would definitely act differently._

_They left Konoha village as the sun was rising. Sasuke had decided to make the trip to see Temari with Sakura even though she no longer needed protection. He said he needed a break, as if his work was a tedious, repetitive job._

_They traveled quickly and made good time the first day and the next. They reached the village sooner than Sasuke had expected. Sakura led the way to Temari's house, hoping she remembered the paths correctly._

_Temari smiled when she saw Sakura, but her smile faded a little when she saw Sasuke standing behind her. She looked at Sakura meaningfully and Sakura shook her head. She wasn't about to bring awkwardness into Temari's home._

"_Well come in," Temari said and gestured them into the living room, "Good thing I just got back or I would have missed you." She grinned at Sakura, "Still looking?"_

"_You mean, he hasn't…" Sakura said. Temari looked confused._

"_You found him?"_

_Sakura nodded, "Yes, but I haven't seen him since the trial."_

_Temari asked and Sakura told her how and why she had found Gaara, that he had been accused of murder, but they found the real killer, and then he left._

"_They actually put my brother on trial? And he allowed them to do it?" Temari shook her head, "He must have changed more than I thought…"_

_They talked for a while longer, but Temari said she had a meeting with the Kazekage so they didn't stay for long, "But if you need a place to stay tonight, my house is always empty. As long as you stay in separate rooms of course," she added with a grin._

_Later when they were wandering around Sakura realized she had forgotten to give Temari her gift. "Looks like we'll have to go back," she said._

_Sasuke nodded absently, "She seems much mellower than her brother."_

"_Less insane you mean."_

_Sasuke smiled with half his mouth, "I'm glad you agree."_

Gaara listened to the man, resisting the urge to kill his customer.

"I can't afford to go to-"

"Yes I know, that's why you come to me. I'll do it."

"Oh thank you, thank you!"

The majority of his customers were like that. They were either too poor or they had a mission they didn't want people to know about so they had it done privately. They were all afraid of him. Ah well, it's not like he returned to the mercenary business for the money anyway.

_Sakura got up when she heard a knock on the door. Though she hadn't planned on it she and Sasukehad ended up spending the night at Temari's house. She opened the door to her host._

"_Can I talk to you?" she asked, "If you're not trying to sleep or something."_

"_Well, I was doing nothing… but I guess I can interrupt that to talk with you." Sakura stepped back to let Temari in then joined her on the bed. She had been doing nothing; also known as lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling. "Something wrong?"_

"_Not exactly," Temari shrugged, "I hear talk of a new mercenary who has set up on the other side of the village. I think it must be Gaara, but I'm afraid to find out it isn't… Or it is. If you wouldn't mind, could you check for me? I know it's pathetic."_

"_I'd be glad to check it out for you." Sakura said, "As long as you watch Sasuke for me."_

_Temari nodded. The ruby earrings she wore glittered as she did so. "If it's not him just… don't tell me." She stood and left abruptly._

"_Goodnight," Sakura said to the empty room and lay back on the bed. She waited a few minutes before blowing out the lamp. 'What a jerk Gaara is, avoiding his sister. If I had a sister like Temari I would definitely not hide from her.' She fell asleep determined to talk some sense into Gaara._

_She woke up the next morning ready to do so, pushing last night's nightmares out of her mind. She met Temari in the hall and asked if she would keep Sasuke bust for a few hours, "Just in case." Then she left to find the missing brother. 'I wonder what happened to Kankuro?_

_It was easy to find the new man in town and soon she was standing outside a small, somewhat lopsided building. She took a deep breath before going in. There was one large entrance room, furnished only by a single chair at the other end of the room, behind which was a door. No one was present._

"_Hello? Anybody home?" she called, walking into the room. When no one answered she looked around a bit, trying to avoid the back door. 'C'mon, open it! You know you want to! What if there's a dead body, or even better, food!'_

"_Fine!" Sakura strode up to the door and threw it open. The next room was empty, lacking both a dead body and food. There wasn't even a window._

_Sakura closed the door and walked back to the center of the first room. Should she wait? For all she knew whoever lived here wouldn't return for weeks. She was still undecided when a voice asked, "May I help you?"_

Gaara watched her turn around slowly. If he knew her, right now she was thinking he was mad at her, which he wasn't. Merely intrigued.

"Gaara!" Nice place you've got here."

The corner of his mouth twitched, "No it's not, liar." He took off his gourd and leaned it against the wall then sat on the floor. She did the same. "I take it your not here for my services."

She shook her head, "Actually, Temari sent me."

"She knows I'm here?"

"No, she's not sure. She sent me to find out," Sakura said then added softly, "She really does want to see you."

Gaara waved her words away with his hand, he would deal with Temari later, "So why are you here?"

"Well, I came to thank Temari…" She was quiet and in her silence Gaara could feel once again her sadness. He didn't like the way her depression affected him and seemed to pull everything into it.

"Gaara, I was wondering…" she faltered. Gaara watched her hands clenched in her lap, not her face as she spoke. "Would you like a partner?"

"A partner?" he echoed, not quite sure what she mean. "You quit the business."

"I know, but I miss going on missions. What I don't miss is the competition, the teams, always feeling inadequate… not that you need to know that," 'Or care.' "I like being a jeweler too, but I miss the adrenaline I guess. I could stay in Konoha and you could get your business here and if there were really simple missions you didn't want I could do them for you. I don't want the money."

"No…" Gaara said, agreeing with her. He knew what it was like to want to do something, not for the money, but for the sake of doing it.

"No?" she echoed, sounding disappointed.

"Yes, you can be my partner," Gaara reassured her, "I was just… never mind. I'll send you messages in Konoha. If you don't want them either, just send them back."

_Sakura nodded happily. She couldn't believe she had actually had the nerve to ask him, and he that said yes. "Thank you! You won't regret this, I promise!" she could have hugged him right then and there._

"_I probably will." He said, but she guessed he could be joking._

_She stood up then, "I better go. I left Sasuke with Temari. So I guess I'll see you later."_

_Gaara shrugged. He seemed angry about something all of a sudden, but she wasn't about to ask him what. 'Talk about bipolar,' her inner voice thought and she told it to hush, even as she smiled._

_She knocked on Temari's door when she got back and it was the Kazekage who answered. After a moment of surprised silence she bowed quickly, "Good day!"_

"_Good, it's you. Come in quickly." Sakura looked up at him questioningly. He looked awfully distressed. She followed him to the living room where she found a very angry looking Sasuke sitting next to a just as annoyed Temari. They both stood when she came in._

"_You're safe!"_

"_Your friend here is a real pain in the-"_

"_Of course I'm safe Sasuke. I can take care of myself," Sakura rolled her eyes, "Give me a little credit." She turned to Temari, "It's him."_

"_Oh." Temari sat again, "Oh." She looked so lost; Sakura sat next to her without a word._

"_Who?" Sasuke asked._

"_My brother." Temari answered coldly. She looked angry._

_The Kazekage coughed. Temari looked at him, as though just remembering he was there. "Right. I'll get that for you now."_

"_We should go Temari." Sakura said before she could leave the room, "We'll see ourselves out ok?"_

"_Ok." Temari said, "It was nice to see you again Sakura." She said pointedly, glaring at Sasuke._

_When they got outside Sakura turned to Sasuke. She didn't say anything, just glared at him. He shrugged and walked away._

_Sakura sighed. Some things would never change._


	16. Eighth Encounter

_Sakura drummed her fingers on the counter idly. Gods, was she bored. Hopefully Gaara had sent her another mission._

_She didn't know how exactly, but every so often when she got home there would be a letter waiting for her, informing her of her task and with money from her last mission. It wasn't usually much, but it helped; after all business was slow. Like today._

_The chimes rang as the door opened. "Good afternoon." Sakura said brightly, glad for the company. She recognized the black haired woman with even more cheer, "Hinata! It's been a long time since you visited me at work," she scratched her head, pretending to think for a long moment, "Actually, you never visit me."_

_Hinata blushed, "I'm sorry…"_

_Sakura laughed, "Maybe if you'd look at my face, you'd realize I was joking." Hinata hadn't changed so very much in the past few years. Sakura stepped around the counter to stand closer to her, "So, how've you been?"_

"_Good," Hinata smiled and fiddled with a pearl bracelet nervously. Sakura recognized it as the one she had sold to Naruto._

"_So he did give it to you. I thought he'd wimp out."_

_Hinata looked at Sakura, "You made it? Do you know who gave it to me? They didn't leave a note or anything."_

_Sakura almost laughed, but she held back for fear of embarrassing Hinata. How like Naruto to be loud about everything, but too much of a coward to admit his feelings for Hinata to her face. "I'm not sure I should tell you. If your secret admirer wants to remain secret, it's not my place to ruin it."_

"_You're right," Hinata looked thoughtful, "Could you give him something from me in return though?"_

"_Sure!"_

_Hinata asked for paper and a pencil and wrote a note in Sakura's office to the anonymous gift giver. While she was writing a couple came in and looked around._

_Sakura helped them as best she could but they told her they were just browsing for now so she sat back behind the counter. Hinata came out of her office and handed her the folded note. "Thank you Sakura."_

"_No problem. Let's hope they remember they gave you the bracelet." Sakura said with a sly wink, "While you're here, see anything that caught your eye?"_

"_I don't usually wear jewelry…" Hinata twirled her bracelet around her wrist a few times, "But I might as well take a look."_

_The couple left without buying anything, 'Losers', but Hinata ended up buying a ring before she left. Sakura waited another half hour or so before closing for the night._

'_Please let there be a message,' Sakura hoped as she walked home. She was glad she had convinced Gaara to take her on. She liked not having levels of missions, and the missions she got were very different. She had missed the excitement. Gaara seemed to have faith in her capabilities, more than she herself had. He sent her missions she knew she wouldn't have gotten before; missions she would have been scared to accept. And some tasks he sent her were absurdly easy and mundane. She wondered why people wasted their money on these things when it would be so easy to do them for themselves._

_She slid Hinata's note under Naruto's door before opening her own. Sure enough there was that familiar yellow scroll with Gaara's symbol on it._

_She picked it up and read through it quickly. Gaara wanted her to meet him in the forest the next morning for a mission of special circumstances._

_She growled at his vague instructions but she was excited anyway. What kind of mission would need the both of them?_

_And despite being his 'partner' Sakura hadn't seen Gaara since they first agreed to do business together. That was months ago now._

_She put down the scroll and started peeling off layers of clothing as she made her way to the bathroom. 'A bath would be nice.'_

If Gaara was the type who did such things he would be making some useless gesture of impatience at the moment. If she didn't arrive soon she would be late.

There she was now. Gaara took a moment to study her as she approached. She still looked much the same as ever.

She looked up at him hidden in the tree and waved, "Good morning Gaara!" She was still as sharp as ever too.

He dropped down beside her. "I'll explain as we go. The mansion is a ways away."

She nodded and they left. He explained the mission to her. A woman had come to him a few days ago, asking him to retrieve her child. The little boy had been taken by his father, a wealthy lord who had no children with his wife.

"So what do you want me to do?" Sakura asked.

"I want you to get inside. As a servant, or any way you can think of without causing a fuss. I can't go because they would recognize me. The mansion is well guarded, so I'll be your backup."

"Ok." Sakura was silent for a while, thinking. "Does the child have a nanny do you think? Could we take her away?"

Gaara nodded, "Possibly."

They reached the house soon after and watched it, hidden in the trees.

"You should have told me in the letter. I'm not dressed for this." Sakura whispered. Gaara looked at her and snorted. He motioned for her to follow him further back into the forest.

"I've got a plan." She said before he had a chance to suggest anything, "I'll act like I was attacked, stumble in there and ask for work, or a place to stay. I'll get in with the nanny somehow, or the lord if I have to. Then I'll get the child and the nanny and myself all alone and you can take the nanny away, put on a show and I'll save the boy…"

"This all seems rather complicated."

Sakura glared at him, "Well, what did you want?"

"It would be nice if we could do this quickly."

"I don't know why you want me here; you won't even listen to me…" Sakura looked amused at a thought she had, "Did the woman ask you not to traumatize the child?"

"She asked me to avoid killing as much as possible."

"She must not know you." Sakura snorted.

"This is dumb." Gaara said, "You go in there and as soon as you're with the child grab him and run. I'll help you out of there."

"But how will you know when?"

Gaara sighed and rubbed his temple. "You know when you told me I wouldn't regret this…?" Sakura raised an eyebrow at him. "Just do it ok? Don't ask questions."

"Fine." Sakura stood and went to the road, "See you in a while."

Gaara watched her walk down the road to the gate where she was stopped by the guards. He saw her laugh her way past them and disappear behind the walls.

Now it was time to watch.

"_So, where are you from" the lord asked. By now Sakura had decided she really didn't like him. At first when he came to speak with her, his guest, it had seemed like a nice gesture. But considering what had happened with the woman who hired Gaara, she suspected he had other interests, and she was not about to fall for his charm, no matter how handsome he might be._

"_No where really," she answered, "I travel everywhere, hoping to find someplace my services are needed."_

"_Your services?"_

"_Medicine. I heal people." Sakura was almost surprised at how easily the lies came. She had become such a good liar, it almost scared her._

_The lord rubbed his chin, "Oh really? Hm. If I may ask for your aid then? My son is quite sick."_

_Sakura nodded, careful to appear calm. This was perfect! She hadn't been there half a day and she would soon be gone again. Hopefully Gaara was ready._

_She followed the lord past rooms filled with weapons and armed men to a small room at the end of the hall. Inside, lying on a bed, was a young boy, about seven years old._

_Sakura knelt by the boy, "Could I inspect him alone please?"_

_The lord hesitated before letting her do so. "I'll be right outside if you need anything."_

_Sakura held the boy's hand when the lord had left. Poor child, getting mixed up in his parents' problems. "Sorry about this," she whispered and gave him a potion to drink that put him to sleep. She picked him up and held him gently in her arms._

_Thanked the gods she had never gotten pregnant._

"_Ok Gaara…" she murmured and he appeared. "Oh. I didn't actually expect you to come." She smiled a little, reminded of a sort of genie._

"_You go ahead, I'll follow after." He told her._

"_But-"_

"_I trust you can find your own way out without getting caught," he said scornfully. Sakura nodded and left through the window. She didn't want to know what he would do._

_She had no time to wonder. She was soon seen by guards who gave chase. Fortunately there didn't seem to be anyone with real skill among them._

_She had almost made it to the gate when she was proven wrong. There was at least two skilled men among the guards and they both chose that moment to attack her._

_She dodged their attacks and jumped to the top of the wall. She looked back quickly but could see no sign of Gaara before she attacked again. This time she pretended to lose her balance and fell backwards off the wall to the sound of their laughter. 'Idiots.' On her way down she flipped neatly and landed running. If only she didn't have the boy she could do more than just run. Where the hell was Gaara?_

_She felt the men catching up with her and jumped above the trees turning back to the mansion. It was chaos, men falling everywhere, running away and at the heart of it all was Gaara, of course._

_She dropped back into the trees and started running back towards the castle, hoping she was silent enough to evade her pursuers._

_She wasn't. As she was knocked out of the tree she turned so she hit the trunk with her feet and bounced back, jumping from tree to tree, narrowly avoiding missiles aimed at her vitals. 'Idiots, they could hit the boy, and where would they be then?'_

_She stopped before coming into view of the mansion and checked to make sure the boy was still sleeping, and alive. She called to Gaara as she made her way back inside the walls. "Gaara! Stop wasting time and let's go!"_

_She narrowly dodged a kick and turned to face her opponent. Only one of the other ninjas had followed her. He started making symbols with his hands but Sakura kicked him, breaking a few of his fingers. It seemed she was going to have to fight him with her feet until Gaara decided to show._

_Or until she finished him off. He wasn't very strong he realized, or very old for that matter. She was holding him back at least when Gaara made his grand entrance, appearing behind him and enveloping him sand. Sakura got away before she could see what become of him._

"What the hell were you doing?" Sakura asked accusingly. Gaara didn't like her tone, "I almost got killed!"

Gaara snorted, "It didn't look that way to me."

"Well-"

"You're fine, so let's just get this over with." He had forgotten how contrary she could be. He had actually looked forward to seeing her again. 'Never again.' He vowed.

He was off and she followed him with the child. He had told their employer to come back in two weeks, or he would find her. That was ten days ago.

He stopped outside Konoha, "I'll send you your money soon," he said and waited for Sakura to hand him the boy.

But she held him closer, "Nuh-uh. There's no way I'm leaving you alone with an innocent child."

He sighed irritably, "If I were to kill him then we wouldn't get our money, now would we?" He held out his arms for the boy.

Sakura shook her head, "No. I'm going with you."

"Fine. Let's go." If she had any idea how close he was to strangling her at that moment…

"Now? You don't want to get lunch or something?"

"It's not really a good time for that now,"

Sakura glanced at the boy in her arms and shrugged, "I guess." What a ridiculous woman.

* * *

**Moohaha. I'm a turd**

**nishasha: I love you.**

**Chanteru-chan: I really don't mind that you didn't review for every chapter. I'm glad actually. And I'm glad you like it.**


	17. Part 2

_Sakura sat in the back room with the boy while Gaara was out getting his mother. The boy had woken up earlier that morning, but he didn't cry as she expected him to. He just sat there quietly, staring at the wall. He reminded her disturbingly of Gaara._

_Sakura didn't like it; she couldn't stand all the silence that had become part of her life. "So… what's your mom like?"_

_The boy's eyes were so empty when he looked at her she almost ran away. He was too much like the other. "Mother's dead."_

"_No, we're bringing you back to her."_

_The boy shook his head, "Mother is dead."_

_Sakura starting worrying then that they were doing the wrong thing, but she told herself to stop. The boy must have been told his mother was dead. Or the lord's wife had posed as the boy's mother, but she was now dead. 'There are plenty of good, sane explanations. Why do you have to be so hysterical?'_

_When Gaara came back he asked if she wanted to come with him to return the boy and she said no, watched them leave silently. She sighed after they left, looking around at the empty room. How could Gaara stand this place? _

_Sakura hated it._

_She sat in the corner as close to the wall as she could, closed her eyes and imagined it was full of things. Beautiful furniture, lots of light, books, random things cluttering up the room. And people. People who talked quietly about their families and their jobs, normal things. Real people things. All the things she wanted back._

"_You got them Sakura. You had them and it wasn't enough for you. It isn't what you want or expect it to be. So what do you want?_

"_I don't know. Something more." She realized she was talking to herself and his empty room and stopped._

When Gaara returned he found Sakura still in that position, huddled in the corner, though he had no idea why she was there. Of course, he alsohad no idea how to respond to this situation, so he did nothing.

She looked up when she finallynoticed his presence. He had expected her to be crying, emotional creature that she was, but her eyes were clean and dry.

"How did it go?" she asked.

Gaara shrugged. It was strange, the way the boy hadn't shown any happiness to see his mother. But who was he to judge such things. He wouldn't understand such feelings.

"I have a bad feeling about all this Gaara."

"Well?"

Sakura turned back to the wall embarrassed. Her cheeks grew red. "I don't know. I just don't like it. Can we follow them?"

"Fine." Gaara didn't know why he was encouraging her paranoid delusions, but he did so all the same. He figured this was the sort of thing that led to insanity. 'Maybe it will be nice, the two of us crazies.'

They followed the woman out into the desert. She held the boy's hand tightly, though he did not resist or react to her, and no one came near. When they were out in the desert where their presence would be obvious, Gaara hid himself and Sakura in sand.

The woman stopped eventually and Sakura got down low to watch her. The woman seemed to be waiting for something, or someone.

After a while two figures joined her. Gaara recognized one of them as the ninja who had escaped him at the mansion. Sakura gave him a look, as if to say, "You didn't kill him?" but he pretended not to notice and instead watched the scene unfold, as though it were of some interest to him.

"Fools," the woman was yelling at the two men, "You were supposed to keep the lord alive!"

"It wasn't our fault, that madman you hired killed him before we could get close." The taller man said.

"Yeah and he almost killed me," the other man muttered, "Next time, maybe you should hire someone less bloodthirsty. Maybe then your plan would work."

The woman hissed and grabbed the man by his throat, "Maybe next time, you won't be there to mess up my plans!" she dropped him soon and turned to the boy, "What are we supposed to do with him now?"

"Give him back to us." Sakura called as she stood. Gaara could have slapped her for being so stupid. It was a wonder she was still alive after all these years of living with her limited brain power and common sense.

The woman smirked and shook her head, "Unless you're willing to pay the ransom yourself…"

Sakura narrowed her eyes at the woman. She almost looked dangerous when she did that, Gaara thought.

"No?" the woman continued, "Than back off, pretty girl and go back home to your man. No point in dying for trying to be a hero."

"I wasn't planning on killing you," Sakura said, still glaring, "But I've changed my mind."

The tall man laughed, "Stupid woman, you're nothing without that freak and I don't see him here."

"That wasn't very nice." Sakura said and jumped at the man, conveniently placing herself between the boy and the three adults.

Gaara rolled his eyes. H supposed that now would be the time to intervene. The others were so busy fighting each other they didn't notice until he had scooped them into the air, where they tried their best to free themselves of his sand. Everyone tried the first time. Of course, there wouldn't be a second time for these three.

"What you said about me, that was mean," Gaara told the man who had called him a freak. Gaara crushed the man beside him. Sakura jumped to cover the boy as blood rained down from the sky. She hid her face from the sight.

"And you. You should have paid me more. Maybe then I wouldn't have agreed to follow you." Gaara told the woman as he crushed her and the last man and stood in the warm rain. He raised his face to it and breathed deeply. How long had it been?Sakura did her best to hide from it. When he eventually turned to her she was shaking. Was it because he had killed those men? She had always run away before she could see anything until now. Maybe the sight was too much for her. Maybe the truth was too much. "This is what I am." He said quietly, angrily.

But Sakura didn't hear. She turned to him, holding the boy's face to her shoulder. "There's no one left… No one for him and it's our fault. We did this Gaara."

"Yes we did."

"We're monsters!" She yelled. She was covered in blood. Gaara thought fleetingly that he had never seen anyone look as beautiful as she did then. But it was not the time for those thoughts. Now was the time for truth.

"I have always been a monster."

* * *

**Oh nose! What will they do now?**

**Hao'sAnjul: Nyar. You're going to be mad now... But no worries, something will happen in the end.**

**Ardell: Wow. You're too flattering. Eheh, but seriously, one day I'll be a real published writer and I'll write my name from here in the back for you to recognize ok?  
I'm glad you like it!**


	18. Separation

"_You're back." Argan smiled widely at her. The old woman behind him smiled as well, but she smiled for other reasons._

"_Yes. I guess I like it here too much," Sakura said, returning his smile. It hadn't been easy to find them this time; hopefully she would learn what she wanted. "This time I'll stay longer, I hope."_

"_Did you find your friend?" the old woman asked._

"_Yes, thanks to your help."_

"_And?"_

"_And?" Sakura raised her eyebrows in response to the woman's question, "Actually, I was wondering if I could speak with you tonight."_

_The old woman smiled, her features disappearing in the deep wrinkles of her face. "Why wait? You may ride with me, and my husband of course." She gave the old man a fond pat on his hand._

"_I would be honored," Sakura said with a polite bow. There was something about the old woman, something she hadn't seen before that commanded her respect now. She wondered how she had missed it before._

_She helped the old couple onto the back of one of their giant beasts and joined them under the canvas stretched above it. The beast's back was flat, an ideal feature for riding._

"_When I last saw you-" Sakura started._

"_What of your friend? Where is he now?" the old woman interrupted. She may have been a bit awe inspiring, but she was still rude._

"_I don't know. I haven't seen him since… For some months."_

"_Then what are you searching for?"_

"_For you, that's why I'm here. You told me to move on, but how do I do that?"_

"_What of the other one?"_

"_Other one? Sasuke?" Sakura asked and the old womannodded. Sakura felt so strange having this conversation with a stranger, but it was oddly comforting. "What about him?"_

"_He could be yours, and yet you will not have him. Why will you not stand in front of him and say 'I'll take you'?"_

"_Because I can't-"_

"_Will not."_

"_Sasuke is just a friend."_

"_Why?" the old woman tilted her head to the side, "What makes a friend?"_

"_There are no romantic feelings. I don't feel that for him anymore."_

"_Will not feel such things. It's not his fault; it is your own for locking yourself away and not trying to feel anything. Move on. Find someone and tell them…"_

"_I'll take you?"_

_The old woman nodded. Sakura sighed. It wasn't as easy as she made it sound. If it was that easy she wouldn't be here now. First she would have to find someone and there was no one._

"_How about Argan?" the old woman asked, as though she had read Sakura's thoughts. "He will not be difficult with you."_

_As strange as it felt, Sakura took her advice and sought out Argan. She decided she would just talk to him, get to know him. That was what she needed right?_

_She could still hear the old woman calling her foolish as she sat down with Argan at dinner._

"_I'm glad you came back." He told her._

"_Me too," she said, and she meant it. Argan's kindness made her feel she was where she should be; it made her feel she belonged. "I never thought it would be possible, but I like this desert. Every time I return it feels more and more like home. More than my own house even."_

"_Not everyone can call one place home forever."_

"_I guess."_

"_And just think of the square footage our home has!" Argan said, spreading his arms to include the desert, the night air, and the people who called it home._

Running. Floating. Flying. Across endless sands and forests and water, never going anywhere. All to avoid her. To avoid thinking of her. Anything to stop seeing her in his mind, screaming, walking away. To stop replaying his cold reaction and her denial, her arguments. She was always there with her arguing and denying and he was always there with his coldness. He just let her go. He let her slip through his fingers like water. If only she was made of sand, he could have held on.

Why should he hold on? Why shouldn't he want to be alone? She was at fault here; she was the one who ran away. She was always running away.

'That's not true.'

She didn't run away this time; she came back. Well, he didn't want to see her. He was sick of being weak with herand sick of her pain, her energy, sick of feeling guilty. He was tired of seeing that scene in his head, again and again, over again. He hated everything but this feeling, this emptiness. This freedom.

_Sakura woke up afraid, her heart beating furiously against the cage that was her chest, trying to break free. For a long while she didn't move; she lay there and waited for the fluttering in her chest to stop._

_When her heart returned to its normal rhythm she opened her eyes to the night sky. The night in the desert was so open, so limitless, yet within the circle of the men and women of the desert it felt safe. It felt like home._

_Argan turned over so he faced her. With their faces hardly inches apart Sakura felt like she was a child again, staying awake late at night whispering with Ino. Only, Argan was not Ino._

"_What is it that scares you so much?" Argan asked softly, "You have woken up at night afraid very often."_

_Sakura smiled, knowing he couldn't see it. She could only see his outline in the moonlight, but he was a comforting presence anyway. "The usual. You know, one night it's a gang of murderers, the next it's a demon." 'And the next it's a boy.'_

"_I have never met anyone who has so many nightmares."_

"_I'll bet most people don't have as many reasons to have nightmares as me," Sakura said, and immediately regretted it. She sounded like a whiny brat. Other people did too have reasons for nightmares. So she had a few bad experiences, so did everybody, right?_

_Argan turned back over onto his back. Sakura slid over on her blanket so she was closer to him._

"_I'm glad I'm here." She said quietly. 'I'm glad I'm here with you.'_

Gaara watched the boy through the window. He sat in the room full of children, but he was alone. Gaara knew the feeling.

Sakura had taken the boy here, to this orphanage. A place for children who were alone in the world. Where was this place when he was a child? Not that it seemed to make much of a difference. The boy was still alone; he still didn't interact with the others.

Gaara watched him all day, until the children were sent to bed. All the boys slept in the same room, in rows of beds. The boy Gaara watched slept on the bed closest to the window.

When the others were all asleep, still the boy lay awake, staring out the window. Finally the boy opened the window and looked out. "I know you're here." He said.

Gaara went inside and sat on the boy's bed and coughed quietly, bringing attention to himself. The boy turned around and stared at him wide-eyed.

"What are you?" he asked. "You remind me of someone…"

"I'm no one." Gaara said, "A ghost. A monster."

The boy sat on the floor at Gaara's feet. "You don't look like a monster. You're not even slimy."

Gaara frowned at the boy, "You don't have to be slimy to be a monster."

"Sure you do."

"No."

The boy shrugged. Gaara glared at him, but the boy seemed unaffected. It was strange, but Gaara found it stranger still because he himself wasn't so very affected. As though he was used to not being feared. As though he was used to defiance.

"Why are you here then?" The boy asked, "You're not a ghost I know."

Gaara shrugged, "I have no reason to be here. The dead have no reason to be in the living world."

"What's your name?"

"Gaara."

"I'm Benji. Pleased to meet you Gaara. My mom is dead." Just like that. Hello, my parents are dead.

"I know." Gaara said. He was the one who had killed them after all.

"Will you teach me how to disappear and stuff?"

"No. That's a special ghost ability. But I can teach you other things."

_Something was missing. There was an empty spot in her stomach. Sakura went to ask the old woman about it, but she only laughed and told her she should learn how to better follow advice._

_Sakura left angry._

_She was sick of that woman always thinking she was right. Not everyone needs a lover. Not everyone needs that to feel complete, and she was one of those people._

_Argan caught her as she was storming away. "Hey you, what's got you so ruffled?"_

_Sakura breathed deeply. "Nothing, I just…" She grabbed Argan's face suddenly and pulled him towards her for a kiss. She stopped before their lips touched though._

"_I don't want to do this." She realized out loud, andpushed Argan away. He almost fell backwards before recovering from the strength of her push. She walked away. "It's not you, and that old hag is wrong. This isn't what I need."_

_Argan walked up to her, "Are you ok?"_

_She turned to him; feeling lost all of a sudden, "Yes. I'm sorry about that. I just realized though, I have a job to get back to. I have friends who are probably worried about me. I've been gone a long time."_

"_You have to go back?" Argan asked._

'_That's not it. I want to go back.' But she didn't tell Argan that. She didn't want to hurt his feelings after he had been so kind to her. "Yes. I'm going back. Want to come?"_

"_No thank you, I should stay here. This will always be my home."_

"_Ok." Sakura nodded, and they started walking back to the camp. "I'll get my stuff and leave tomorrow morning."_

Benji laughed as he jumped from a tree. Gaara hadn't expected the boy to laugh so much, or he would never have told him he would teach him jutsus.

Benji didn't have much talent, except for doppelgangers. He was very good at making copies of himself, good enough that some days he would make a copy of himself to go through the day at the orphanage while he wandered around outside.

He was a strange boy. He didn't get along with any of the other orphans, but for some reason he seemed to idolize Gaara. No one had ever done that before, and Benji of all people had no reason to do so. Gaara was the reason he lived in an orphanage now. Well, it could be said that it was Sakura's fault; it was her idea to bring the boy here, but Gaara was the reason he needed a new home.

Tonight he didn't want to teach him anything, so he meditated while Benji ran around and jumped through the trees. Seeing as how Benji came out every night to learn from Gaara he didn't get much sleep. He didn't suffer at all from the lack of sleep unfortunately.

Benji crouched in front of Gaara; even in his meditative state he was completely aware of the boy.

"You're much too loud." Gaara told him. "While you're running around, why don't you practice doing so silently?"

Benji breathed loudly; he wasn't a very fit boy. He was kind of chubby actually. "You know something Mister Gaara? I don't think you're a real ghost."

"Oh really? Then what do you think I am?"

Benji shrugged, "I dunno yet. Maybe some sort of angel. An angel that takes care of orphans."

Gaara laughed. He laughed more than he had ever laughed in his life. An angel! Him! He, who had always been called a demon; demon of the sand, an angel! And this was coming from a boy whose parents he had murdered. It was too much.

Benji sat back and pouted, "Are you making fun of me?"

"I think you're making fun of me." Gaara said, still grinning a little. "Now go away."

"I changed my mind. You're too mean to be an angel." Benji said. Gaara ignored him and closed his eyes. Benji didn't move. After a while he lay down and went to sleep beside Gaara.

_When Sakura came back it was raining. It always rained on her when she came back. "Yeah, yeah, I get it. It's a sign!" she yelled at the sky. She smiled as rain dripped down her face and into her mouth. "Trying to drown me now, are you?"_

_She went home first; the door squeaked when she opened it. Naruto and Sasuke's apartment looked empty._

_When she got inside she had that strange feeling; like when you enter an old room, where everything is covered in an inch of dust. She felt like a stranger, looking into someone else's past._

_She laughed at herself and walked into the kitchen, setting the kettle on to boil, and went to her bedroom to change into clean clothes. Anything that didn't reek._

_While she was changing her door squeaked again. She quickly pulled her shirt all the way on and crept out to see what it was. The door was open, but no one was in the room. She had learned from her experience with Gaara not to trust that though._

"_Sakura, you're home!" Ino squealed and bowled her over, back into her bedroom. Sakura let herself fall back, right onto the bed._

"_I missed you!" Ino was saying, and nuzzling Sakura's cheek, "I was here all alone for so long with no one to talk to."_

_Sakura laughed, "I'm sure Mark kept you company just fine."_

_Ino was quiet, her face hidden against Sakura's collar bone. Sakura looked at the top of her head and patted her back. "Ino?"_

"_Yeah, we broke up." She said, "I broke up with him actually, but I still felt like shit." She looked up and smiled at Sakura brightly, "But now that you're home I feel all better!" She pulled her to her feet and back into the kitchen. "You know, not much else had happened since you left. Nothing happens here without you. Sasuke and Naruto go out even more often, Gaara never visits…" she glanced at Sakura out of the corner of her eye._

_Sakura shook her head, "I didn't see Gaara at all this time. I haven't seen him for a long time."_

"_Oh." Ino looked strangely disappointed. She sat at the table and rested her chin on her fists. "So where were you then?"_

"_The desert."_

"_Wait a minute. You were in the desert… without Gaara?"_

"_Yes." Sakura shrugged, took the kettle off the heat and poured the water into a teapot. "I guess, he must have been avoiding me. Which is fine. I didn't really want to see him anyway." She said._

_Ino snorted, "Liar."_

_Sakura set a cup in front of Ino with a loud clink. Ino looked up and met her eyes with a smile. "But if you're happy, then so am I."_

"_Good." Sakura took a long drink of tea, enjoying how it burned its way down her throat._

_Ino eyed her, "You know Sakura, if you want a better burning feeling… We should go drinking!" She jumped up and pulled Sakura out the door._

_Sakura smiled. She was home with Ino.

* * *

_

**Dum de dum. I'll run away... now.**

**Hao'sAnjul: snicker**

**nishasha: You're right. The kid has got to be in the equation somewhere. My sister read it and said he and Gaara were like Seeshomaru and Rin. I laughed at her.**

**kanamey: Cliff hangers are my favorite, but I also hate them when I'm reading a book because I have to put them down sometimes... They're even worse on Heh. Thanks for your kind review!**

**blueberryprincess: I'm glad so many people like that I haven't rushed anything, because personally I very much dislike rushed relationships and whatnot.**

**Elisa Ardell: Thanks!**


	19. Part 2

Gaara swatted at Benji as he jumped at him from a tree six feet above. He flew back and landed with a poof; just another doppelganger. Seconds later Gaara caught Benji in his sand as he fell from the next tree over. He crossed his hands behind his head as Benji jumped down into the stream.

Benji was happy playing in the stream by himself for a while, but he soon came back to bug Gaara.

"Hey Mister Gaara."

"What now?" Gaara asked, very annoyed. The boy asked too many questions, all the time. And the questions he asked were never ordinary, easy to answer questions, questions other children might have asked. They came out of nowhere, his barrage of questions.

"How long do you think we can stay like this?"

Gaara opened one eye to look at Benji. Why did the boy always have to ask such questions? "Like this? Until you have to go back in the morning." He told the boy, though he guessed that wasn't what Benji meant.

Benji shook his head, "I mean, how long can we stay together? I know one day I'm going to grow up and they'll send me away from the orphanage and then you'll leave, won't you?"

Gaara shrugged, "You could be adopted."

Benji snorted. "No one is going to adopt me."

"Of course not. You're never there when they come to adopt you. Maybe you should make an effort instead of sending in replicas to do all the work for you."

Benji tipped his head to the side and thought about what Gaara said for a long while. Then he shrugged, "Nah."

_Sakura woke up in bed with Ino. Ino's arms were thrown across her waist and she had drooledall overSakura's shoulder._

_She smiled, after a week of this, she was starting to get used to the wet feeling. And Ino's sleeping habits.Ino was definitely not ready to be alone, even though she was the one who dumped Mark.She was just sucha friendly person, a people person._

_And Ino liked to drink. She hadn't been so into drinking before, but now she insisted that they go out every night and drink until they couldn't remember anything. Sakura never drank as much as Ino; she was the one who had to make sure they both got home and to bed safely. She wasn't the one who broke up with her longtime boyfriend. She was the one with a job._

"_I'm off to work honey," she said and kissed Ino's forehead, "Don't break anything while I'm gone."_

_Ino moaned, covered her head in a pillow and waved her away._

_Sakura hummed as she walked down the streets to her shop. She had never really noticed her humming until Gaara yelled at her for it, and now she couldn't stop. She didn't even know what she was singing; she doubted it was a real song. It was probably just something she made up years ago, when she was young._

_There was a man waiting outside her shop when she got there. She tried not to panic, not to be so paranoid, but a big ball of dread had already found a home in her stomach. She thought that surely this was the one, the one who would take away her shop and her apartment. It didn't make any sense for her to think that, really, but she thought it all the same. She had become so paranoid it sickened her. She tapped the man on the shoulder and cleared her throat, "Can I help you sir?"_

_He turned around and straightened. She almost dropped her keys in surprise when she saw his face, "Kazekage! What are you doing here?"_

_He frowned and she bowed apologetically, "I mean, welcome and thank you for the honour…" she looked up at him from her bow, "Of your visit?"_

_He laughed then, "Hello to you too Sakura, and don't worry, I'm not here on any official business."_

"_And that's supposed to reassure me?" she asked. She opened the door to her shop and let him in, turning on the lights and straightening the counter as she talked with him. "So if not that, then why are you here?"_

_He hmmed and fiddled with an earring. She was already all weirded out by his appearance here, and now his dodgy behavior was making her nervous on top of that. Shouldn't he be someplace more important?_

"_So I hear you and Gaara have a business?" he asked._

"_Not anymore." Sakura told him, surprised at how much it hurt to say so. Well, she was bored out of her mind without those missions to keep her going… "We went our separate ways after the last mission."_

"_Oh." He seemed disappointed. "I wanted to hire you."_

"_Why didn't you just go to him?"_

"_Well, first of all, I can't find him."_

"_You can't find him?" Sakura asked. What had Gaara gotten himself into now? "Where is he?"_

"_Well…"_

"_Never mind, stupid question." She flipped the sign in the window to open and turned her back to the Kazekage, "What kind of mission was it anyway?"_

_He switched to super shifty mode then, desperately trying to avoid her question, "Well… I was really just hoping you would know where to find Gaara, but since it seems you know about as much as I do; you can't be much help to me now. This mission was really perfect for someone with his capabilities…" He turned to leave._

"_What kind of mission was it?" Sakura asked again, more forcefully this time._

_He turned back to her slowly; he had this look on his face, that scared, dreading look. "I'm not so sure I should tell you that."_

_Sakura shrugged, "Fine. If you think so…" she pulled a half finished bracelet from under the counter and started working on it. She ignored him as he stood watching her, strangely undecided. She was losing confidence in his abilities as the Kazekage the more time she spent with him. Of course it could all be an act._

_He had been leaning over her work for a while before he spoke again. He had started to remind her of Gaara, but when he spoke she lost that illusion quickly._

"_You're pretty good you know?"_

_Sakura snorted. "I don't need your flattery. If you're not going to employ me you should probably leave, I'm sure there's some important business waiting for you back home."_

"_That's exactly what I'm afraid of."_

Gaara tried not to laugh. Here he was sitting watching adults walk past a boy; the same boy who was sitting right next to him. It was like one of those sappy movies about a sad little orphan that would one day be adopted into a loving, happy family.

Those movies full of lies. They were the reason so many orphans were so depressed. And probably because of their lack of parents too, that might be the reason they would tend towards depression.

Benji sighed as the man and woman walked out of the orphanage with a baby boy in their arms. "Everyone wants a baby." He said and turned his back on them.

Gaara watched in amusement as Benji's copy disappeared. He watched the caretaker freak out for a while before informing Benji of his little mishap.

Benji turned around and ran back to the orphanage faster than Gaara had ever seen him run before. When he got back the caretaker hugged him and slapped his hands. Benji looked out the window and smiled at Gaara.

But Gaara wasn't there anymore. He was sitting in the forest, thinking. He sat there for hours before finally making up his mind.

Benji looked up as the door opened and Gaara walked in. The caretaker, Miss Misumo, looked really scared of Gaara. She wasn't usually afraid of little things though.

Gaara looked around the room. He walked right up to Benji and told him to stand up and turn around. Benji did as he was told and sat back down.

"I want this one." Gaara told the caretaker. She looked absolutely terrified now.

"B-But… He's just a b-boy." She stuttered.

Gaara almost admired her courage. It wasn't often that anyone stood up to him, and this woman was afraid too. "I'm not going to eat him." He said irritated.

"I'll go!" Benji said.

Miss Misumo told him to hush, "I just need you to sign some papers…"

Gaara nodded. The caretaker ran out and came back moments later with some papers and a pen. Gaara signed the papers where she told him to and walked out followed by Benji.

Benji skipped along behind Gaara. "I'm glad you got me out of there. I don't know how much longer I could keep it up with my doppelgangers."

Gaara shrugged.

"What are we going to do now?"

Gaara shrugged again. He had no idea what to do now. He had just adopted a child whose parents were dead because of him. What could he do?

_Sakura was making supper when someone knocked on the door. She hoped it wasn't Naruto come to eat all her food and opened the door hesitantly._

_Gaara raised a hand when she opened the door. "Hello."_

_Sakura opened the door all the way. "Gaara? What are you doing here?" Then she saw the boy standing behind him. "What have you done?"_

_Gaara shrugged, "I adopted him."_

_Sakura was silent, staring at Gaara with that same blank expression he always stared at her with. He shifted uncomfortably, which gave her a fair amount of satisfaction with herself._

"…_Hi, I'm Benji!" The boy said suddenly. Sakura was surprised at how happy he sounded. Nothing like the boy who had haunted her dreams since she killed his father._

"_Hi." She said and leaned over so their eyes were level, "You do know who we are right? What we did?"_

"_Sure." He said, with hardly a trace of sadness. He patted her head comfortingly, "But don't worry, my mommy died a long time ago,and it had nothing to do with you."_

_Sakura stepped back and closed the door on them. What the hell. She rubbed her eyes and banged her head against the door a couple of times. Then she opened it again. They were still standing there._

"_You're still here."_

"_Yes." Gaara said._

_Sakura pinched herself, then she pinched Benji. "Ow!" heyelled and hid behind Gaara._

_Sakura blinked at them a couple more times._

"_We're actually here." Gaara said, "But if you want us to leave, that can happen too."_

"_No, no." Sakura shook her head, "Come in. You can stay for supper at least."_

_

* * *

_

**Doot doot. We are nearing the end... I think.**

**Hao'sAnjul: You can just ignore me. I'm a bit of an airhead sometimes.**

**Genial Hinata: I'm glad you like it.**

**Maiden-of-the-Elements: I very much agree with you! I don't necessarily want romance fics though, they're just my favorite characters. nyar**


	20. Ninth Encounter

"I know you never wanted to see me again, but I didn't know what else to do." Gaara told her. "I don't even know why I adopted him."

"I can hardly believe they let you leave with him." Sakura said.

Benji had fallen asleep on her bed, but the two of them were still awake, drinking tea in her kitchen. Sakura gulped down the last of her cup and set it on the table with a clink.

"Don't worry;" she told him, and patted his shoulder, "You can stay here. I didn't never want to see you again."

"Then why did you tell me you never wanted to see me again?" he asked. He remembered the night they had parted ways, even if she had forgotten.

"Because I was angry." She said, pouring herself another cup, "Because you were being a jerk. Because I felt like a piece of shit."

"That's funny, you never looked like one."

"Haha." Sakura said sarcastically.

Gaara watched her expression change from irritation to regret to exhaustion. She put her head on the table and folded her hands on top of her head.

"Sorry." He said.

She waved the apology away, "I told you, its fine. I just… wow. Ok. This is a lot right now. And… and…"

She never finished her thought. Gaara sat waiting for a while before he realized she was asleep. He rolled his eyes and carried her to her bed, laying her down beside Benji. When he turned to leave she reached out and grabbed his sleeve.

"I'm sorry." She murmured, "It wasn't supposed to happen like this."

_Sometimes when he kissed her it felt like being struck by lighting. As though a current was running through her, making every nerve in her body sing. Sometimes when he kissed her she felt she wasn't even there. She felt like a spectator, watching from outside of her body, two other people there kissing because there was no way that could be her. There was no way she could ever share a moment like that with someone. And sometimes it was just a kiss._

_It was never anything more than a kiss really. She knew that he wanted more, she could feel it when he held her, when he whispered into her ear. Sometimes she wanted more too; her body wanted more than this. But when she thought of that she felt a ball forming in her stomach. A feeling of dread, something like nausea._

_Sakura woke with a start. There were arms wrapped around her waist and they were not Ino's. She glanced down at the small boy hugging her torso and sighed. This was not good; this was bad. She had a headache suddenly._

_If only she could go back to sleep, back to that dream she couldn't remember anymore, she thought. If only she was like Gaara and she could meditate for months without feeling anything. If only she was as unfeeling as him all the time._

_She could really go for some of that unfeelingness right now actually. The little boy who was at that moment snoring happily in her bed beside her, wrapped around her waist, was also the boy who had been in her nightmares for the past months, ever since she had been involved in the death of his father. And Gaara was the reason he was here._

_Speaking of Gaara… he was probably just sitting in the living room now, laughing to himself, thinking about what a sucker she was. Or he was gone already. Thinking that, Sakura was so angry she jumped out of bed, carefully of course, so as not to wake the boy - Benji was it?- and stomped into the living room, ready to show Gaara a whole world of hurt for bringing this in to her life._

_He wasn't in the living room when Sakura got there. She stood there for a long while. She hadn't actually thought he would leave her there all alone with the boy. That was low of him. Lower than low. It was... It was..._

_Her lower lip started trembling, but she clamped her hand over her mouth. She hadn't cried for the past fouryears; she wasn't about to start crying now, over something like this. Gaara was not going to get her this time._

'_Then why are you on the floor?'_

"_It's comfortable." Sakura argued, trying to rationalize her actions to herself. "It's just because my head hurts, and I feel kind of dizzy, and it's easier on the floor." As if to prove her point she curled over and put her forehead on the floor._

'_You're such a liar. Even to yourself.'_

"_Shut up." Sakura gulped air loudly to keep from crying. If she started now she would have to go on and on, to make up for lost years. She couldn't start now. She would not._

_She lifted her head from the floor to watch feet come in to her home. 'Those aren't Ino's feet…' She lifted her head even further, up to kneecaps, then the waist, stopping at the chest. She didn't want to look at the face, not yet._

"_What are you doing?" he asked._

_And it was strange; those four words made her feel like crying even more than anything she hadthought before._

"_I thought you were gone forever." She said, disgusted with how pathetic her voice sounded. She wiped non existent snot from her upper lip and looked up at Gaara, "Where were you?"_

_Gaara dropped a bag on the floor. "I went to get some stuff from my 'office'."_

"_Oh." Sakura felt so lame at that moment. She wished she could sort of just… melt into a puddle on the floor and seep through the cracks between the floorboards. And she wished Gaara would stop looking at her like that. She stood up and brushed her knees off in what she hoped seemed a blazé manner. "Ok then. I guess I'll make breakfast now."_

_Gaara looked over his shoulder back out the window. "Even you usually wait until the sun is ready to rise before eating breakfast."_

_Sakura followed his gaze and realized it was the middle of the night. She couldn't have been asleep more than a few hours then. No wonder she was so moody._

_She glared at Gaara. "Fine. I guess I'll just go back to bed. Don't break anything."_

_She got back into bed slowly, but she needn't have worried about waking Benji up. He slept like a rock._

Benji was following him. He followed him everywhere. Gaara was getting kind of sick of the boy already, so he went to visit Sakura at her shop. Benji seemed to enjoy bothering her even more than bothering Gaara.

He was even more excited by her shop when they got there anyway. Benji ran around looking at jewelry on display as Gaara walked past Sakura into her office and closed the door behind him. It didn't do much to shut out Sakura's laughter.

Gaara breathed deeply and smiled at the peace and quiet he found in the office. Sakura's office was neat- like all her space- and small. It wasn't much like his own place of work had been. It was nice.

He frowned when he realized he could still hear Benji talking through the door. If he had known how much he was going to talk he would never have adopted him in the first place. Adopting him had been a very bad idea; possibly the worst idea of his life. Sakura laughed again, and he relaxed. No need to think about that, no need to worry; Sakura would take care of things.

Sakura walked in and grabbed and few tools, patted him on the shoulder and walked out again. Just a simple gesture, but he could feel the shadow of her touch on his shoulder long after she was gone. Why was she so comforting? No one had ever had this effect on him before.

'Aw, is the wittle fool in love?'

Gaara snorted. Stupid demon, 'I highly doubt it.'

'You're going soft on me. I mean, come on, let's go kill something!'

'Now that you mention it…' it had been a long time since he had last killed anything. He stood and left through the window. Let Sakura deal with the boy.

_"Oh my god Sakura, you're a mommy!" Ino squealed and pounced over the counter at Benji. He squealed and tried to get away but he couldn't escape her loving clutches. "You are so adorable!" she told him, then put him down, "But seriously Sakura, who's the kid?"_

_Sakura didn't look up from her book as she said, "He's Gaara's."_

_Benji laughed as Ino's mouth dropped open much wider than he had ever thought possible._

_"What the hell?" Ino asked._

_"Hey, watch your language!" Sakura scolded her._

_Ino looked sheepishly at Benji, "Sorry. Never use that sentence, it's bad. At leastuntil you're older." Then she winked at him. That's when he decided he liked her. She turned back to Sakura then, but grabbed Benji and held him on her lap, "Come on Sakura. It's story time!"_

_Sakura looked up at them then, for a moment looking as though she was about to launch into some big explanation, but instead she just shrugged. "Ask Benji, he was there."_

_Ino set Benji in front of her and put her hands on her fists, "Ok, tell me your story."_

_"Hey guys, would you go into the office please? I'm still open for customers." Sakura asked them and oblinginly they followed her orders._

_Sakura breathed deeply once they were in the office. Gaara had left about an hour ago, so they were safe from him, and she was safe from them. She wasn't really looking forward to the end of Benji's story, when they would both inevitably come out and want to talk to her about it, especially Ino. What would she tell Ino? How could she explain the situation with Gaara?_

_"Oh right..." she said to the empty shop, remembering the Kazekage's visit a few days ago. She should probably have told Gaara about that. Oh well, she could tell him later. 'Because he's staying.' she smiled a little, but then she realized... "Oh god, we're going to be like... a family." she shuddered at the thought._

_A woman walked in the door then and Sakura smiled at her like the good business woman she had become. The woman didn't take long to decide on an anklet and then she left. Ino and Benji were still in the office. Sakura stood with her arms crossed and watched the door fearfully. Any moment now..._

_Ino burst out of the room and hug-tackled Sakura. "I'm so happy for you! You're going to be a real family now!" she squealed into Sakura's ear, temporarily deafening her._

_Sakura glared at Benji over Ino's shoulder, "What did you tell her?"_

_Benji shrugged, "Only that Mr Gaara adopted me, and now we're going to live with you."_

_"Woah there," Sakura said, "That hasn't been decided yet...And did you just call him, 'Mr Gaara'?" She snorted, trying to suppress her laughter._

_Ino frowned at her, "And what's so funny about that?"_

_"Well, everything!" Sakura gasped, turning to Benji, who was pouting, "I don't mean to be rude you know. But I'm sure you can call him Gaara. Just Gaara."_

_"But do you know what he did for me?" Benji asked, dismayed at the thought that his hero could be 'just Gaara'._

_"I've heard stories," Sakura said, rolling her eyes. 'And knowing how he feels about being a hero he probably did much more for the boy than he wants me to know.'_

_"Well, I don't care what you say," Benji declared, "To me he will always be Mr Gaara!"_

'Mr' Gaara sat on the roof and glowered at the moon. Finally everyone was asleep and he could have some peace and quiet and for some reason he didn't really want it. He frowned as Ino's snoring rose up out through the window to meet his ears. She hadn't left after dinner; instead she had gone to bed with Sakura and she slept on one side of Sakura with her arms wrapped around her waist while Benji slept on the other side. If Sakura was going to have so many guests sleeping over all the time she should really think about getting another bed.

Gaara looked up as Benji joined him on the roof.

"Couldn't sleep?" Benji asked, with a look of concern on his face. Gaara snorted and looked at the moon again.

"Yeah, that's it."

Benji crossed his arms behind his head and lay back, "Me neither." He sighed deeply and wiggled his toes at the night sky.

Gaara looked across the village to a lighted room where a man and a woman sat, enjoying a late night chat. They had been just sitting there for hours now. Gaara wondered briefly what they talked about, what was so fascinating they could talk about it for hours and hours without going to bed.

"I like it here." Benji told him. "I hope Mrs Sakura will let us stay."

"Miss Sakura," Gaara corrected him, lazily flicking away a fly attempting to land on his shoulder. "I hope so too." he whispered to himself.

_"Hey Sakura?"_

_"Mm?"_

_"What are you doing?"_

_"I'm counting out the money I need to pay my landlady this month."_

_Ino growled at her, "You know that' s not what I mean. And speaking of her, won't she throw a fit?"_

_Sakura paused her counting for a second to consider her landlady. Miss Misumo was a stickler for propriety. What would she think of Gaara and Benji living with Sakura, a single woman?_

_"Eh." Sakura shrugged. She didn't really care that much what the old bitty thought._

_"Oh my god Sakura, you just said the word bitty in your thoughts." Ino gasped and giggled a little. "And you doknow what I'm talking about!"_

_Sakura wiggled her nose. "Yes, I know what you mean. And I know what I'm doing."_

_"Sakura... Do you love him?"_

_Sakura lost count of her money. She looked down at the money in her hands, but it felt like her hands were somewhere else, floating in the air somewhere, or maybe in space..._

_"Damnit Ino, now I've lost count! Would you stop talking for one minute?"_

_Ino slammed her hand on the table, "I will not!" she said indignantly. "If I wait they could be back before I get what I want out of you!"_

_Sakura rolled her eyes, "Well what do you want?"_

_"I want you to answer my question."_

_"Well I can't, ok?" Sakura folded her hands on the table and watched them intently. "I don't know."_

_Ino sat down closer to Sakura and put her arm around her shoulder. "Well that's something."_

_"Yeah, I guess."_

_Ino squeezed her shoulder, "I think you should keep them. That Benji boy is so adorable!"_

"What do you want Benji?"

Benji squinted up at Gaara, wondering why he was standing in front of the sun. Didn't he know how it hurt his eyes to look at him? "I want to stay with Mrs Sakura."

"Miss Sakura."

Benji frowned, "But if they're married, don't you call them Mrs?"

Gaara nodded, "But she's not married."

Benji's eyes widened, despite the glare of the sun, "You mean you're not...?"

Gaara glared at Benji. "Not?" Then he realized what Benji was thinking and laughed. "Of course we're not married!"

"Then why do you live with her?" Benji asked triumphantly, as though this proved that thye must therefore be married.

"I don't live with her. We are staying with her for a while until we decide what to do. So what do you want Benji?"

"I want to stay with Miss Sakura."

Gaara frowned, suddenly angry with the boy for being so stubborn and stupid. "Well maybe Miss Sakura doesn't want us to stay with her! What will you do then?" Without realizeing it he picked the boy up to his eye level. "She doesn't neccesarily want to keep a whiny brat like you, and a creep like me! Most people wouldn't even let us stay with them for this long! So what will you do?"

Benji burst into tears, "You're lying! Miss Sakura will keep us! She'll let me stay with her!"

Gaara blinked. What was he doing, threatening a little boy? Quickly he put the boy down and knelt beside him. He tried to smile a little, hoping it didn't look as insane as his smiles always ended up looking. "You know, you're right. She will let you stay with her. Would you want that?"

Benji nodded, wiping his cheeks with the back of his hand.

"Even if I can't stay with you?"

"What are you talking about?" Benji asked, "She's going to let you stay too."

"I'm not so sure about that..."

"Well I am!" Benji said, puffing out his chest with his confidence. He put his arm around Gaara and turned him back towards Sakura's apartment. "You just wait and see. She'll take us both!"

"_Let's get married."_

_Sakura jumped, "What?" She barely caught herself before she fell off the roof._

_Gaara didn't look at her, "You heard me."_

"_Yeah, but… why?" 'Yeah exactly, what the hell?'_

"_Isn't that what people do?" he smiled just the tiniest bit, "You're the first person I actually get along with."_

"_Well yes...but Gaara, usually, people get married because they're in love. Or for money. There's part of the equation missing see?" Sure, they shared a child, sort of, but, seriously, what had he been smoking to come up with an idea like that? Even if Ino seemed to think there was something between them, marriage was an idea way out there._

_Gaara shrugged, "Okay then."_

_Sakura blinked at him stupidly. 'That's it?' Nervously she turned back to the sky, "You've got to stop doing this to me. My nerves are bad enough as it is."_

_Gaara snorted._

_"Oh, hey Gaara," she said casually, "The Kazekage came to see me a while ago. He wants you for a mission."_

_"Well I'm done with that." Gaara said, turning away. "At least for now."_

_Sakura leaned back on her roof and crossed her arms behind her head. Tonight she felt closer to the sky than she had ever felt before. She felt as though she could reach out and gather the stars to her chest and cradle them there. Maybe she could hold them inside her chest. She looked over at Gaara. He was still sitting there cross legged, staring at the sky. She wondered what he could be thinking._

'_I'll take you.' She imagined herself saying. He would maybe ask her what she meant and she would tell him about the old woman, and how she had been wrong. How she had decided that she didn't need a man to love her, not the way the old woman thought. Not the way Ino and Mark had loved each other. She would tell him that she would take him and Benji for as long as they wanted. She would take care of them. It wasn't what the woman had meant, but she would laugh at the old woman because what did she care for the ramblings of an old woman? And Gaara wouldn't say anything, he would just be there and he would accept that, the way he accepted everything. That calm way he had about him, once you got past his insanity. She wanted him to stay with her, she would say, she wanted to be with him because with him she felt calm. With him she felt safe._

_Sakura was a little surprised at that last thought, especially when she realized it was true. She had never thought she would feel safe with anyone anymore, and yet here he was, a murderer and a sociopath and he made her feel safe._

_She sat up and scooted over until she was sitting right beside Gaara and leaned on his shoulder. And he said nothing. He just accepted her presence. And that was what she loved most about him._

"_I'll take you."_

_

* * *

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**Bang!**

**The End. (get it? going out with a bang...)**

**Anyhow. Thank you everyone who has been nice to me and reviewed, I hope you enjoy the end and maybe there will be more... But probably not. Doot.**

**WaMat DeBly: You have a coolname. O.O**

**demon-lulu:Yar.**

**thaisha:I have continued! And will do so in the future. Just not with this.**

**nishasha: I think every one of your suggestions has happened. **

**Blam**


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